Where It Is
by Jade-Max
Summary: Sequel to the Short Story "Gone Without Goodbye" of my "Captain & Commander: Rexsoka AU" stories. After Rex is sent after Ahsoka by Anakin, they leave Coruscant together and head to Saleucami to give Ahsoka the space she needs to heal, recover and decide what to do with the rest of her life.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** Star Wars belongs to Disney and is the intellectual property of George Lucas. He created the sandbox. I'm making no money off of this and am simply destroying the sandcastles.

 **Title:** Where It Is  
 **Author:** Jade_Max  
 **Characters:** Ahsoka Tano, Captain Rex and Cut  & Suu Lawquane  
 **Genre:** Angst, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Family  
 **Era:** One week post Season 5, Episode 20, AU

 **Summary:** After Rex is sent after Ahsoka by Anakin, they leave Coruscant together and head to Saleucami to give Ahsoka the space she needs to heal, recover and decide what to do with the rest of her life.  
 **Author's Note:** This story is a direct sequel to the Short Story "Gone Without Goodbye" which is embedded within the last few chapters of my "Captain  & Commander: Rexsoka AU" stories.

 **Author's Note 2:** This fic was inspired, partly, by the song "That's Where It Is" by Carrie Underwood. It is pre-written [2013-2016] and will be posted with weekly updates.

* * *

 **Where It Is**

 ** _Prologue_**

 _Lawquane Homestead - Saleucami_

 _1 week post Ahsoka leaving the Jedi Order_

 _"Do not tell me that you miss me already,"_ the teasing voice of his wife came across the comlink as she picked up the other end. _"You have not been gone for more than an hour."_

"An hour too long," Cut agree with a faint smile, his gaze on the unremarkable speeder that was headed straight towards the farm house and his family. "Are we expecting company, Suu?"

 _"You know we are not."_

"Well, you're about to have some," he told her, all traces of his smile gone as he turned back to the eopie that was his ride. "I'll be home as soon as I can."

 _"Be careful."_

"You too." Flipping the comlink off, Cut leapt to the back of his mount and flicked the reigns as he turned it towards home.

* * *

"Jek!" Shaeeah hissed at her brother with a frown as he peaked through the viewport at the speeder that was coming towards the house. "Mom said to keep low. Get down!"

"They can't see me, Shaeeah," he returned excitedly, ignoring her instruction, "don't you want to know who's coming?"

"Nobody comes here," she returned haughtily, crawling up to join him on the bed. "Unless they want to trade."

"But traders don't come in _speeders_."

"I _know_ that! Why do you think mom told us to stay out of sight?"

Jek let out a whoop of excitement as the speeder slowed and dashed away, racing for the door with a glad cry.

"Jek!" Shaeeah , mindful of her mother's instruction to watch her brother, went racing after him. He was already at the bottom of the stairs by the time she was at the top, and out the door before she could grab him. _"Jek - stop!"_

Another whoop from outside was accompanied by a cry of, "You came back!" and her mother's voice scolding her brother with his full name. Reaching the door, and knowing she'd get just as scolded, if not worse, for not controlling Jek, Shaeeah peaked out - and stopped.

Jek was across the yard and in the arms of a blond haired clone that Shaeeah had never expected to see again, giving him a powerful hug. A clone her father had repeatedly called family since his departure to the point that she and Jek not only remembered him in their memories, but as a part of their lives. He was their father's brother - a brother none of them had expected to return.

 _Rex._

"Uncle Rex!"

Unintentionally following in her brother's footsteps, Shaeeah darted from the house, past her mother, and launched herself at the man who'd helped her father keep them safe almost two years before. Rex crouched as she neared and lunged at him, wrapping her arms around him with youthful enthusiasm. His chuckle was as familiar as her fathers and Shaeeah grinned, hugging him tight. "We didn't know you were coming!"

"Shaeeah. Jek."

Reluctantly detaching herself from Rex, Shaeeah glanced at her mother sheepishly. "Sorry, mom. Sorry Uncle Rex."

"It's impolite to greet one guest and not another," Suu's voice was calm as she met Shaeeah's, drawing her gaze to the left.

It was only then that Shaeeah noted her Uncle wasn't alone. Standing to his left, just behind him, was a female of a species she'd never seen before. Tugging on Jek, she pulled him away from Rex.

As he was released, Rex, still on one knee, turned and stretched one hand out to the young female before his gaze turned back to them. "Shaeeah, Jek, this is Ahsoka Tano. Ahsoka is a very good friend of mine." He beckoned to her and Ahsoka drew closer, visibly curious. "I hope she'll be a good friend of yours, too."

Shaeeah pulled Jek behind her, evaluating the other female with a solemn expression. Ahsoka, like Rex, came down on one knee, to their level. Rex cracked a half smile at his friend. It was a smile Shaeeah found she didn't like one bit.

"Ahsoka, these are Cut and Suu's kids; Shaeeah and Jek."

"I'm pleased to finally meet you, Shaeeah and Jek."

Blinking in surprise, Shaeeah couldn't help but feel that Ahsoka _sounded_ young. Younger than her mom, anyway, and there was a lilt to her words that she hadn't heard before. Too young for Uncle Rex. What was he doing bringing some strange female to meet them anyway? She was so preoccupied she didn't hear her brother's enthusiastic greeting or anything else until her mother spoke.

"Shaeeah."

She flushed at her mother's prompting and blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "What _are_ you?"

Ahsoka blinked, visibly taken aback, but answered. "I'm a Togruta."

"A Togruta? No way!" Jek came out from behind Shaeeah, his eyes shining. "I didn't know Togruta looked like you!"

"Then what did you think we looked like, Jek?"

"Not with awesome horns like that," his eager response was fueled by the friendly tease of Rex's friend. "Dad told me about this Togruta he met back when he was-"

Shaeeah backed up a step as Rex gained his feet, and latched onto his hand as she threw another look at her brother and Rex's friend. This Ahsoka person was suspicious and she didn't like the way her Uncle looked at her. Her gaze was drawn up and away as Rex's hand closed around her own on a squeeze, but it was her mother that he addressed even as Ahsoka and Jek continued to speak animatedly behind them.

"Sorry for showing up unannounced, Suu."

"Unannounced, but not unwanted," Suu's smile was welcoming, the long rifle in her arms cradled nonchalantly. "Cut will be glad you are here."

Shaeeah saw his smile fade a little as he glanced back to his friend. "I'm not so sure about that."

"You have a very interesting _friend_ , Rex," there was no mistaking the teasing in her mother's voice. "Following in Cut's footsteps, are you?"

"Not exactly."

"A story worth hearing then. Will you be staying long?"

"For the night at least, possibly longer," he shifted his feet and Shaeeah got the impression her Uncle was uncomfortable. "If it's not too much trouble."

"I suspect it will depend on the story you and your friend have to tell us." Suu turned her attention to Shaeeah and Jek. "Shaeeah. Jek. Your father will be home shortly to greet our guests. Where are your manners?"

Reluctantly, Shaeeah released Rex's hand and turned back to her brother. "Come on, Jek."

Jek said something she didn't catch to the Togruta before joining her beside their mother. "How can we help, mom?"

Shaeeah was glad she didn't have to ask. Rex's friend seemed suspicious and she didn't want to have to help _her_ if she didn't have to. If she was really lucky, maybe this Ahsoka person would just move on and Rex could be a part of their family again.


	2. Part 1

**Part 1**

"I don't think she likes me very much."

"Shaeeah? She's just met you," Rex countered. "Give her time."

"I think time will just make her dislike me more," Ahsoka's voice was pitched low beside him as Suu gave the children directions and they made for the house. Shaeeah cast another look over her shoulder at them before disappearing within after her brother. "She's awfully fond of her Uncle Rex."

"They are both very fond of Rex, yes," Suu joined their conversation as the children moved out of sight. "Cut does not let them forget what he has done for our family."

Clearing his throat, Rex couldn't help the gruffness in his voice. "I'm right here, Suu."

"And Cut will be upset he was not here to greet you. What brings you back to Saleucami?"

Rex glanced at Ahsoka. "Ahsoka wanted to meet you."

Ahsoka's gaze met his and he could see the confusion, the question, in her gaze, but she nodded and extended her hand for a proper greeting. "Rex has told me so much about you and Cut and your children, Suu. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

"Rex-"

"I didn't include you in my official report," Rex read her alarm correctly and instantly strove to put her at ease. "Ahsoka only found out about you a few days ago."

"And you just… decided to come and visit?" He couldn't blame her for her skepticism. "Cut has told me a little about your Army. You do not get leave the way normal soldiers do."

"Not often and not for long," Ahsoka agreed hesitantly, starting to withdraw her hand, "but it's not unheard of and this… this isn't exactly leave. If we're imposing…"

Suu's hand shot out and grasped hers with a firm clasp. "Never. Rex is family. Anyone he considers friend enough to bring with him is welcome here. Welcome, Ahsoka, to our home."

Rex saw her relax and was grateful to Suu for putting her at ease.

"Thanks for having me." Ahsoka's smile returned. "You have a pair of very lovely children."

"You have only seen them on their best behavior so far," Suu countered dryly, releasing the handshake. "If you choose to stay for a while, you may revise your opinion."

"Is Cut out in the fields?"

"He saw your speeder and is returning," Suu motioned for them to follow her. "His comlink will be off, but he will not worry when he sees that we are not in the courtyard. Come. We will wait for him inside."

* * *

"Suu?"

Ahsoka looked up as another clone stepped into the house, his craggy features slightly older than Rex's, but lined with the marks of both pleasure and pain. He wore the strangest outfit she'd ever seen on a clone, and that included Rex's civvies, but it was his eyes that snared her attention. They darted around the room with a quick look only to fall on Suu with such a profound relief that Ahsoka turned her gaze to Rex.

Rex, who was smiling, was already part way out of his seat as Cut, and it _had_ to be Cut, turned back, as if suddenly realizing who was in the room.

"Rex?"

"Cut."

"Rex!" Cut enveloped Rex in a hug that made Ahsoka grin, but she didn't get out of her chair as she watched the reunion. "I didn't expect to see your sorry mug again."

"I take it you don't own a looking glass."

Cut chuckled, slapping his brother on the back and then let him go, holding him at arm's length for a quick inspection. "What's with the civvies?"

"A long story," Rex's gaze turned her way, diverting Cut's attention as well. "Cut, this is Ahsoka Tano. Ahsoka - Cut Lawquane."

"It's nice to meet you." She rose to her feet and extended her hand, which was promptly grasped in a familiar, and yet not, solid hand shake. "Rex has told me everything you and Suu did for him while he was here last, Cut. I can't thank you enough for-"

"We don't need your thanks, Miss Tano," Cut offered her a smile as he cut her off. "Rex is family. I'm glad we could give him a place to stay and recover, but it was the medic who did all the work. Rex actually helped save my family while he was here."

"So I've heard." Suu had just finished relating the tale from her point of view when Cut had come through the door. Rex, to Ahsoka's amusement, hadn't taken the Twi'lek woman's praise very well. "I'm sorry we showed up unannounced, we didn't mean to take you away from your work."

"The harvest is all but done," Cut told her with a shrug as he settled into one of the chairs beside Suu. Ahsoka took the hint and settled back into hers, Rex doing the same. "Mostly it's range riding on the eopie right now and bringing them in where they'll be easier to care for through the cold season."

"Do you get winter here?"

"Our version of it," Cut smiled, reaching over to take his wife's hand in plain view and twine their fingers together. "We get the odd snow storm, but it's normally just cold enough not to be able to plant anything."

"And you're going into that season now."

He nodded. "It lasts about four galactic months, best as we can figure." Cut looked at them both. "You didn't come here to discuss the weather or the climate, though. What brings you back to Salucami, Rex?"

Rex folded his hands together on the table. "Necessity."

"Necessity."

Trust Rex to be as short as possible, even with a brother. Ahsoka reached over and placed one hand on his forearm, her gaze on Cut and Suu. "Rex brought me here at my request. We needed a place to lie low, somewhere people wouldn't recognize us, as we try to figure out what we're going to do next."

"We?" Suu's gaze dropped inquiringly to where her hand was on Rex's forearm and Ahsoka hastily removed it, flushing as she realized she hadn't thought twice about touching Rex as she always had. Among Torrent Company it wasn't something they'd really been aware of or noted, it was simply part of their daily lives. Having Suu draw attention to it suddenly made Ahsoka self-conscious.

"Following in my footsteps, Rex?" Cut's tone was teasing but Ahsoka could see his eyes were serious. "The life of a deserter isn't easy."

"Rex isn't a deserter," the last thing Ahsoka wanted was for anyone to think that. "He's... my traveling companion."

"On an extended leave pass?"

"With genuine discharge papers," Rex countered with a shake of his head. "It was requested I go with her."

"You are welcome here, of course," Suu interjected soothingly before Cut could ask for an explanation of the statement, "providing you are not bringing trouble."

"Thank you." Ahsoka offered sincerely, "I don't think-"

"Mom!" Jek cut her off as he came running back into the room, paused and then promptly threw himself at Cut. "Dad! You're home early."

"I saw your Uncle Rex's speeder," Cut hugged his son in a one armed embrace that didn't require he release Suu's hand. The child looking delighted to be there, much as he had hugging Rex, Ahsoka realized. She found herself charmed by the familial interaction.

"You knew they were coming?"

"Who else knows we're here?"

"No one," Jek sounded smug saying that. "Can they stay dad? Please? Shaeeah and I made up the spare room. We got towels and blankets and everything!"

"Good man." Cut put his son back on the floor and patted his shoulder proudly. "How about it Rex? I could use the help with the round up if you're going to stick around for a couple of weeks."

"Weeks?" Ahsoka immediately balked at the thought. Until they'd actually reached the farm, she'd thought nothing of imposing on Cut and Suu for an extended period of time. It had taken meeting them to realize what a disruption they'd be bringing into the happy home. "Rex, I don't think-"

He shot her a look and Ahsoka snapped her lips shut. Something in the depths of Rex's eyes told her that he had a plan. He looked determined and she knew better than to argue with that expression. She trusted him implicitly.

Rex took up her line of thinking. "We don't want to impose, Cut."

"No imposition," the farmer assured them with a smile. "You're family. Of course, it will mean sharing a room while you're here as we don't have much in the way of extra space."

"It wouldn't be the first time," Rex assured his brother with a grateful nod, not seeming to notice as Cut's eyebrows rose in surprise. "While we're here, you can put us to work."

"In fact, I'm going to insist you do," Ahsoka interjected. "We're not used to being idle and I, for one, will welcome the chance to feel useful again."

"Well, if you're adamant," Cut grinned. "I'm sure Suu and I can find a few extra chores around the place that need doing."

"Does that mean Uncle Rex is going to stay?"

"Sure does," Cut assured his son.

"Yay!"

"For now," Suu rose to her feet and extracted her hand from her husband's, "let us get your things and we will show you the room. It is not much, but it is clean and comfortable and you are welcome to it for as long as you wish to remain."

* * *

"Well, she did say it wasn't much," Ahsoka's amusement, to Rex's ears, was slightly forced.

The guest room at the Lawquane's was small, about the side of his quarters back on the Resolute, but held a double bed instead of a single. On the end of the bed there was a stack of cloth a quick inspection showed to be a spare set of sheets and two sets of towels. An armoire and a side table gave them space to store their gear, which was done promptly as there wasn't much, but it was the bed held her gaze.

Rex knew; he watched her carefully. Easily able to read her thoughts, he chuckled as he stowed his duffle in the armoire. "It won't be the first time, Ahsoka."

"No," her eyes twinkled when they looked his way, "but you always complain I kick in my sleep."

"A fact is not a complaint."

"True." She agreed, turning fully towards him. "Cut and Suu said to take it easy for the rest of today. Anything in particular you want to do?"

"Explore." He nodded towards the door, his sharp hearing having caught the soft footfalls of littler person steps. "Shaeeah or Jek can show us around while Suu and Cut are busy. Right, kids?"

There was a gasp beyond the portal and then a giggle before it swung open, revealing a grinning Jek and a much more serious Shaeeah.

"Busted!"

Jek's enthusiasm was infectious and Rex caught Ahsoka's grin from the corner of his eye as he addressed them. "Have either of you any objections to showing us around the homestead?"

"I think you saw almost everything last time you were here, Uncle Rex," Shaeeah told him with a shake of her head, glancing at Ahsoka before looking back his way. "What else would you want to see?"

"What else?!" Jek spun on his sister. "Uncle Rex only saw the barn and the house last time. There's the crashed ship we found where all those droids came from. And the upgrades Dad's done to the yard. The river and the play house dad built. There's _lots_ he hasn't seen." Frowning, he pinned her with a look. "What's with you, Shaeeah, aren't you happy Uncle Rex is here?"

Rex glanced at Ahsoka and, to his surprise, Ahsoka stepped in before the girl could answer.

"I don't think it's your Uncle Rex she's worried about, Jek. I'm a stranger and she's right to be wary."

"But you're Uncle Rex's friend," he sounded confused. "You can't be a bad person if he calls you his friend."

Crouching down, Ahsoka got to Jek's level as his face fell. "I'm not saying I'm a bad person, just that you shouldn't trust strangers with all your secrets because someone says so. Trust is earned, not given, and can be broken if you don't give it to the right person." Her look held a wealth of meaning and pain, despite her semi-cheerful tone, as it turned his way. "Right, Rex?"

"Right." He knew Ahsoka was thinking about Barriss and he couldn't help but be reminded of Slick despite the number of years it had been since that betrayal. "Let's start small. Your dad has repaired the damage those droids caused since I was here," he tried for nonchalance and wasn't sure he succeeded, "how about we take a look?"

Jek latched onto the idea as readily as he latched onto Ahsoka's hand, practically dragging her from the room and starting to animatedly tell her about the improvements his father had made since the droids had come to wreck the place.

Thus, their first day at the Lawquane's was spent being toured around the main farm before dinner, Jek playing an enthusiastic and loud tour guide. Shaeeah, to Rex's growing concern, followed them around but seemed subdued. With no other conclusions to draw, we put it down to the fact she just wasn't used to Ahsoka yet. With time, he had little doubt that the two of them would be as friendly as the Togruta and Jek.

Shaeeah would simply have to get to know Ahsoka a little better.


	3. Part 2

**Part 2**

 ** _Saleucami - One Week Post Arrival_**

"Like this, Rex."

Rex adjusted his hold, mimicking the way Cut was holding his brush and then reapplying it to the side of the eopie, double checking Cut's technique before resuming his task.

"Better." Cut flashed him a smile and fully turned back to his own eopie.

"Thanks."

They worked in silence for several minutes, brushing down the mounts they'd been using to survey the Lawquane's farm. There was a rustle near the door and Rex's head came up as he tensed, reaching for his blaster with his free hand only to pause, stop, give his head a shake as he recognized the familiar tread, and turn back to his work. He didn't notice Cut shoot him a curiously amused look.

His recognition was rewarded when, sure enough, Ahsoka's voice rang out after a moment or two. "Rex, you in here?" Her steps stopped near the front of the barn.

Rex continued what he'd been doing, keeping his strokes the firm and circular motion that Cut had shown him. "In the back."

Her footsteps drew nearer until she appeared over the low stall partition, her blue eyes alight with curiosity as she folded her arms over the top of the wall. Her gaze turned Cut's way - Rex saw it from the corner of his - as she flashed the farmer a smile. "Hey Cut."

"Miss Tano."

She rolled her eyes. "Call me Ahsoka, would you? I've never been called 'Miss anything' in my life, until you."

"No?" Cut didn't sound so certain. "What'd they call you then? Rex hasn't exactly been forthcoming on how you two met."

"Rex."

He shrugged, glancing her way at her exasperated admonishment. "It's not my story to tell."

"No, it's _our_ story," she agreed, "but Cut and Suu are friends. Family. They deserve to know."

Knowing her as well as he did, Rex heard the unspoken, _I thought they already did_. He turned his gaze back to his work. He'd hoped, he reflected, to keep Cut and Suu from finding out for a while to ensure they got to know _her_ without any preconceived notions. No hope for it now. "Cut, meet former Jedi Padawan, Ahsoka Tano," he glanced at Cut as he spoke, gauging his brother's reaction and wasn't disappointed when Cut practically snapped to attention in reflex at the mention of a Jedi. "Torrent Company's Commander for most of the war to date and my Superior Officer."

Cut conquered the reflex quickly and his attention posture was dropped without apology or explanation. "A Jedi, huh?"

"Former," her insistence was light but even. Rex _knew_ she was still struggling with the idea that she'd left everything behind. She was good at hiding it, but Rex knew her well enough to know what she wasn't saying. "If I had known you didn't know, I would have told you sooner."

"And just why would I have known?"

Rex saw her flush and cast a glance his way before turning her attention back to Cut. "Arrogance, I guess," she told Cut with a self-depreciating smile. "I just assumed that Rex had told you as much about me in the last few days as I've heard about you and your family, in mine."

"You've barely been here a week," Cut was gracious in his acceptance of that response, something, Rex suspected, that he must have learned from Suu. "Leaving a life of service isn't easy to come to terms with. I know a thing or two about it myself."

"It's not that we didn't trust you, Cut. I really did think that Rex had told you."

"And I'm sure he had his reasons not to." Cut hung up the brush he was using, finished his task, and led the eopie from the stall, hobbling it outside. He turned back and collected the necessary implements to clean out the stall. "Did you need him for something?"

"What?"

"You came into the barn looking for him," Cut reminded her with a grin. "Did you need him for something?"

"I was hoping I could lend a hand with whatever you guys are doing."

"Stir crazy already?" Rex teased.

She stuck her tongue out at him. "I'm used to being a little more active than housework and basic chores."

"When we're done here, I can spare Rex to spar with you."

The unexpected offer from Cut had Rex raising his eyebrows.

"Really?" Her face lit up and her expression turned eager. "You don't need him for something else?"

"Once the stalls are cleaned out and the eopie fed, the chores are done," Cut offered him a look Rex didn't quite understand - and that was saying something. "If you're willing, that is, Rex."

"I could use a good work out," he agreed, unwilling to watch anything dim the sparkle in her eyes, especially a confession from _him_ that he was too tired for it after a long day on the back of the awkward creature he was rubbing down. Just looking at her, though, he could already feel the start of a second wind. Sparring with Ahsoka wasn't something to be missed and always got his blood up. She was one of the few people able to fight him to a standstill.

"Are you guys done, Cut?"

"Just about."

"Wizard!" She flashed them another grin, one that lit her whole face and made him glad he'd accepted. "I saw a spot behind the house that would make a good sparring ring. Come and find me there when you're done, Rex."

She was gone before he could answer. With a faint smile on his lips, Rex shook his head and turned back to his chores. The sound of the stall being cleaned next to him was almost rhythmic as Cut raked it out efficiently. Not yet done grooming his mount, Rex knew it was just a matter of time before he showed the same proficiency as his brother, providing he applied himself.

Which he was set on doing.

After a couple of minutes, Cut's voice broke the silence once again. "I think I finally understand why you went back."

Rex didn't take his eyes off the creature in front of him as he continued to work on its back. Eopie didn't really have hair, but their skin, he'd been told, required careful attention to ensure parasites didn't burrow into the soft gaps between semi-hard overlapping plates. "I told you why I had to go back."

"You said family. I didn't realize you had _her_ waiting for you back there."

"Ahsoka is a part of that family, but not all of it." Rex finished rubbing the eopie, not willing, even then, to explore the complicated relationship that was he and Ahsoka. "Do I take the eopie out of the stall next?"

"Yeah. Hobble her next to mine."

Rex did as he was instructed, caressing the bald plate on top of the creature's head with one hand before turning back to the stall. Cut was leaning on a rake, watching him with a serious expression. "Are you really that blind, _vod_?"

Rex glanced back at his tie down with a frown. "Did I do it wrong?"

"The eopie is fine, Rex. I'm talking about Ahsoka."

"What about her?"

"Don't give me that. You look at her the same way I look at Suu."

"Not likely." Had he really been looking at her like that? "We're _friends_ , Cut."

"So are Suu and I," he seemed amused. "That doesn't mean we're not more, too."

"You and Suu are married," Rex moved to collect the rake that was sitting next to the stall he'd been working in, ducking his head and distinctly uncomfortable with the direction of their conversation. "Ahsoka and I are not."

"Rex…" Cut sounded exasperated. "I wasn't always married to Suu. We started out the same as you two."

"You're seeing things."

"Am I?" Rex could almost _feel_ Cut looking at him and kept his head down as he began to rake out the eopie's stall. "Ahsoka may have been your commanding officer, but neither of you are in the GAR anymore, _vod_. You're not bound by those rules and regulations out here."

"It wouldn't work."

"You can't know that. You have feelings for her," there wasn't a shred of anything but confidence in Cut's tone; a confidence that made Rex uneasy, "and she obviously has feelings for you."

"Enough, Cut." Rex put up the rake and finally met his brother's gaze head on. "Ahsoka's been through hell. She was accused of a crime she didn't commit, turned on by the men she thought she could trust, stripped of her rank in both the Jedi and the GAR and nearly sentenced to death after being betrayed by her closest Jedi friend." He kept his voice even, without inflection, but he needed to make Cut understand _why_ this line of talk was futile. No matter how much he cared about Ahsoka, be it as a friend or possibly more - whatever that was - there was no _way_ he could act on what he was feeling. She needed a friend to support her while she figured out what she wanted to do, so a friend he would continue to be. "She's walked away from everything she's ever known because of her principles; because the _Jedi_ couldn't look at her and see she would _never_ do the things she'd been accused of until they were given _proof_."

Cut was silent, his expression solemn, but he didn't interrupt as Rex continued.

"It would be remiss of me, as her _friend_ , to even think about anything more, let alone asking for it, when she doesn't know what she wants right now."

"And if she wants you?"

Rex grunted, not even willing to allow himself to consider it. Ahsoka needed to find out what she was going to do on her own before anything else. If there was a place for him with her when she had… only then would he revisit the question. If it was relevant. "I'll stand beside her, with her, behind her, whatever she needs, for as long as she wants me here."

"That's not what I mean, Rex." Cut shook his head.

"Until Ahsoka's had some time to really think about what comes next, Cut, that's all it can mean." Turning back to his chores, Rex gave his brother his back and resumed cleaning out the stall. Cut took the hint and resumed his own chores, offering only the odd comment and direction related to work, but dropped the subject of his relationship with Ahsoka.

Rex only wished he could do the same.

As he finished cleaning out the stall, he considered what Cut had been trying to tell him. It wasn't that he hadn't considered what Cut had said in the privacy of his own thoughts, but he'd thought he'd been doing a better job of hiding them. Now that Cut had mentioned it aloud, though, his brain wouldn't let it go.

He did care about Ashoka; a lot more than he probably should have or was supposed to. Still, he wasn't willing to act on any of it. Ahsoka, as he'd told Cut, needed a friend right now. Someone who would support her, someone who would help her make the decisions she needed to and not try and guide her in the direction Rex felt she needed to go. Not that he had any idea where that was. He couldn't see Ahsoka as anything but a Jedi and, because of that, he was honestly at a loss as to what decision she'd make.

In the end, the only conclusion he'd come to had been the same one that he'd reached in the lodging station as they'd been making their decision to come and visit Suu and Cut; the same decision he'd just voiced to Cut. He would be beside her, support her, no matter what choice she made, for as long as she needed him there; for as long as she allowed him to be.

When it came time for her to leave him, he would have no regrets.

* * *

Sparring with Ahsoka, especially after the talk with Cut, proved to be interesting and more than a little uncomfortable.

She'd shucked her boots and leggings, leaving herself in her bare feet, with a distracting expanse of sienna skin running up from the ground to the burgundy of her skirt. Rex had known, the moment he'd walked behind the house and into the area she'd cleared to catch sight of her, that he was in trouble.

"Where are your boots?"

"Barefoot is more fun," she returned with a sassy smirk. "Come on, Rex; strip. Into your skivvies!"

He chuckled, removing his shirt, socks and boots, but nothing else as he entered the circle she'd created and began to stretch. "Something tells me skivvies with children around are not a good idea."

Ahsoka mirrored his stretch and made a moue of disappointment. "Darn. Here I was hoping for a taste of home."

"Home?"

"The _Resolute_ ," she supplied, but Rex suspected she knew that he'd known where she was speaking of despite his inquiry. "I wonder what the Company's up to right now."

Rex glanced at sky. Galactic Standard Time was almost fourteen hours ahead of Saleucami so he made an educated guess based on the angle of the setting sun. "Probably crawling out of their racks and groaning about morning PT."

"That's gotta be something you don't miss."

"What, the morning PT?"

"Yeah."

Rex shrugged, shaking his arms a little to loosen up and entered another stretch. "We've been out every morning before sunrise for a ten mile run, Ahsoka. If that's not morning PT, what is?"

Her laughter rang through the clearing. "You've got me there, Rex. We don't need to do ten miles every morning you know. Cut and Suu keep us busy enough through the day."

Oh, he knew. He wasn't willing to give up that time alone with her though. They didn't talk much on those runs, but then, there had never been reason for them to talk much when they'd been a team for so long. "You don't need to come with me if you'd rather not."

"I didn't say that, I just said we didn't have to."

"I enjoy our mornings."

"So do I." Her smile was genuine. "Ready for this, Rexster?"

He came smoothly out of his last stretch and shook himself, checking his readiness and then nodded, taking up a defensive stance. "When you are, Commander." Ahsoka flinched and Rex barely managed not to wince. "Sorry, Ahsoka. Habit."

"It's okay, I'm bound to slip up and call you Captain every now and again too." She stepped to the center of the clearing and began to circle him, carefully balanced on the balls of her feet. "Especially when we do things like this."

He gave her a nod, glad she wasn't upset with him, and then reacted with a block as she attempted to strike him with a jab. That first punch started the match and it was a match neither was particularly eager to surrender.

* * *

Suu sipped her caf as she watched Rex and Ahsoka in her back yard, dodging and side stepping, often accepting a blow in turn for a hip throw or roll or leg sweep. The two of them were smiling, Rex looking more open than he had since his arrival, as they traded blows.

An arm slid around her waist, familiar lips brushing the curve of her lekku, as Cut stepped up behind her and placed his chin on her shoulder. Together they watched the duo in silence before Suu finally broke it, offering him a taste of her caf.

"How long do you think they will last?"

"Sparring?" Cut's tone was amused as she tipped the glass to his lips, swallowing before answering. "Hours."

Suu cast him a look she knew he'd understand.

Sure enough, Cut simply smiled and shrugged. "With everything I learned about what they've been through today, it sounds like this isn't anything new, Suu."

"Nothing new?" she turned her gaze back to the duo.

Cut filled her in on what Rex had told him in the stable while they watched the pair spar. There was no doubting both were enjoying themselves immensely. Ahsoka's laughter was only faintly audible as she swept Rex's feet and pinned him on the ground, her expression triumphant, as Cut finished his explanation. "Rex told me to drop it."

"Surely they are not unaware of the attraction between them?"

"Not from what I can gather. At least, Rex isn't." He sighed, his chest rising against her back as his arms tightened around her waist. Rex, beyond the viewport, neatly flipped Ahsoka from his person to pin her just as she'd had him pinned. "Just watching them together gives me this urge to take you upstairs and-"

"Cut."

"Come on, Suu, when was the last time we wrestled like that?"

She chuckled, covering one of his hands with her own. "One might say last night."

"Not like that," he nodded to the couple outside as Ahsoka threw Rex off and they regained their feet, coming together just as swiftly with a series of jabs and grabs, more of a grapple-wrestling match than a sparring one now. Somehow the duo remained on their feet, arms locked, as each tried to gain the upper hand. "She holds her own pretty good."

"Do you think you would?"

"What, hold my own against Rex?"

"Yes."

Cut considered it and then shook his head. "He's got years of experience under his belt I don't. Much as I hate to admit it," he brushed his lips against her cheek, "I've softened some."

Setting the mug aside, Suu turned in his arms, winding her own around his waist as she offered him a smile. "There we do not agree."

"Put me up against a soldier like Rex and you would."

"You have changed, yes, but you are not softer, Cut. If... _when_ our family needs defending again, you will be more than capable of rising to the challenge."

"Suu..." She closed her eyes as his ragged breath cut off on a kiss, his lips brushing hers. "You don't fight fair."

Leaning in, she kissed him this time before stepping away reluctantly, her tone teasing. "When have I ever fought fair?"

He chuckled, releasing her even though his hands lingered on her waist. "Good point. Unlike you though, Ahsoka does."

She turned in time to see the Togruta take Rex back to the ground, pinning him with a scissor of her legs, only to have it reversed as Rex rolled with the momentum. It sent them rolling across the ground, before Rex's hands encircled Ahsoka's wrists and they were pinned next to her head.

Both were breathing heavily, visible even from a distance Suu could see it, and there was no mistaking the stillness that accompanied the pin. The atmosphere changed, even to Suu's view, and she shook her head when neither moved, wondering if Rex would take the opportunity Cut would never have passed up. Rex, surprisingly, did and pulled back even as she watched. The moment was lost as Rex offered Ahsoka a hand up.

"Were that you...?" she slanted a look at her husband suggestively, already knowing the answer.

"Ask me later." His voice was low as the rioting sound of the children reached her, coming closer, and she knew the rare, privately quiet moment was about to end. "When we're alone and not about to be overrun."

"I will hold you to that."

His smile was all promise and innuendo as he stepped back. "I expect you to."

Shaeeah and Jek burst through the door at that moment, effectively ending their conversation.


	4. Part 3

**Part 3**

 _Saleucami - Ten days post arrival_

Rex woke to a montral to the side of the face and a toe in the shin as Ahsoka shifted and twitched in her sleep. It wasn't anything new; every time they slept this close together, his nights were mostly a routine of broken sleep and rude awakenings. He wasn't one to sleep through any kind of disturbance and Rex could only be grateful for the genetic makeup that allowed him to subsist on the barest of sleep required, broken though it was.

After almost two weeks of it, however, he would have done much for a solid eight hours of uninterrupted rack time. Maybe he should sleep on the floor? Exhaling on a long suffering sigh, he went to give her his back, only to stop when she moaned softly, as if pained.

Turning, Rex frowned as he examined her sleeping face, cast in darkness and shadow. He couldn't make out much from the starlight coming in through the viewport, but he could see the prominent lines on her forehead and hear her gasped breaths.

"Ahsoka?"

Her head tossed with another pained moan, nearly hitting him with the same appendage that had originally woken him. She thrashed, her legs and arms twisting in the sheets, and Rex reached out to touch her shoulder. "Ahsoka. Wake up."

"No..." her voice caught on the word, nearly breaking. "I didn't… Wolffe, I could never have -!"

It was all he needed to hear to know what she was dreaming about and Rex gripped her shoulder tighter. "Ahsoka." He raised his voice a little. "Ahsoka, wake up."

She struggled against him for a minute, her broken protestations of innocence getting louder and more violent as she nearly threw him off the bed. Worried her nightmare would wake their hosts, or the kids, Rex bodily pinned her to the mattress even as he placed his lips right against one of her montrals and spoke against it. "Ahsoka, it's Rex. You're dreaming, kid."

There was a long moment of tense resistance and just as Rex was expecting her to try and throw him away again, she relaxed in his grip. He rolled, taking his weight off her and his lips from the supple flesh of her montral. He saw her eyes luminesce as they opened and focused on their brilliance.

There was a moment of quiet where she seemed to come back to herself and then, she exhaled softly. "Rex?"

"I'm here."

"Did I…?" Her voice was as quiet as his and he saw her lift her head to look towards the door.

Rex shook his head. "I don't think you woke anyone else."

"Just you." She sighed, her head dropping back to the pillow. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," he settled back, tucking his arms behind his head and staring at the darkened ceiling. "You're not the only one who has nightmares."

"I'm the only one who has to be called 'kid' to wake up from them though."

"Sorry." He chuckled at her dry tone of voice. "It just slipped out."

"Don't be," she echoed his previous answer back to him. "If it works, there's nothing to be sorry for." Ahsoka paused and then the bed shifted and her shadowed face, eyes luminescing, appeared within his field of vision. Her words feathered across his bare chest. "Thanks, Rex."

"For what?"

"Stopping me before I did." Her fingertips touched the elbow nearest to her. "If I'd been alone, I don't think I would have."

"Imagining Jek jumping on you to find out what was wrong?"

"That…" he saw her jaw work and could only imagine the grimace on her face, "and tossing him unintentionally across the room before realizing who he was."

"You wouldn't."

"I would," she countered seriously. "Just like you try to toss me whenever I'm the one waking _you_ up."

Which never, he knew, lasted long. As soon as she touched him, he was often awake and able to check his reactions. Ahsoka, on the other hand, hadn't slept well since that first night in the lodging station and she wasn't trained for the kind of sleep deprivation he was. It had led to longer intervals while trying to wake her with more violence than most would have been prepared for. Having seen the progression, Rex found he was ready for just about anything, even being tossed across the room with the Force, if it ever came to that. It was one of the reasons he grabbed her so tightly.

"You're never going to get a good night's sleep next to me, you know." Ahsoka dropped out of sight and he felt the bed shift again. "I should sleep on the floor."

"If I wanted a good night's sleep that badly, Ahsoka, I would."

"Then why don't you?"

He considered her question. Part of him was berating himself for not having done it sooner, but the other part, the larger part, knew he couldn't abandon her like that. Sleeping next to her was surprisingly soothing, for all it could be awkward sometimes. It was a difference from their past lives, a very acute one, which helped tether him to the here and now. "I prefer to sleep next to you," he told her honestly, choosing his words carefully and ever mindful of his discussion with Cut out in the barn and what he couldn't say. "It's reassuring. Comforting."

"Comforting?" she sounded less than convinced. "You _like_ getting woken every couple of hours?"

"What I _like_ ," Rex countered with a faint smile he knew she couldn't see with his arm in the way, "is knowing that you're next to me. Knowing you're safe."

A heartbeat passed and Ahsoka voiced the last of it, the words he couldn't bring himself to say. "You like knowing I haven't left without you."

The silence was heavy for several minutes before Rex pushed himself into a sitting position and, reaching to the side table, flipped on the light. He looked down at her where she lay next to him, now able to see her serious expression instead of just guessing at it. Lifting one leg, he braced his forearm on the knee, the covers tenting and draping around him as he adjusted his seat, his other hand braced under the pillow behind him. Their gazes clashed and clung, brown against blue.

"I wouldn't, Rex." Ahsoka stayed lying where she was, watching him with a slightly pained expression. "I couldn't, you know."

"No?"

"If you hadn't come after me, I'd have regretted walking away without coming to see you."

"Just not enough to think of it at the time."

"That's unfair." She pushed up on her elbows, scowling. "There were other things I was thinking about and I wasn't exactly thinking straight about everyone I had to leave behind."

"I know it's selfish," he agreed, "but that's how I feel."

"What - that I could just up and leave you again without a second thought?"

Anakin might have charged him with her safekeeping, but that wasn't why he'd _chosen_ to stay with her. He could have left her in Cut and Suu's keeping and returned to the GAR, fully confident she would be okay. He could have sent her here with a letter of introduction the Lawquanes would have accepted without question or challenge. He could have walked away and let her do what she needed to without his presence as a lodestone around her neck. He was, most assuredly, being selfish, but Rex couldn't feel guilty about it.

For all he could have done to leave her behind and separate his path from hers, he hadn't. He'd stuck with her, even though she was well recovered from the mob's tender mercies - as exhibited by their now frequent sparring matches. That she might leave him behind, and not the other way around, crossed his thoughts daily. She'd done it once, was it so farfetched to think she might do so again?

He nodded to her question but held his peace.

"Rex…" she sighed, staying where she was, looking at him without wavering. "We're a team. I know I almost walked away without saying goodbye, and that I would have if you hadn't come after me, but I'm not going to do it again. I wouldn't. Okay?"

"One day, you're going to leave here, whether it's with me or not," his words were even as he struggled to find the right ones without making it sound as if he was blaming her, "there's going to come a time when you no longer need me, Ahsoka. When I _will_ slow you down."

"Never."

His lips split into a faint half smile. "My genetics say otherwise."

"Then we'll find a way to alter them," she sounded nonchalant as she said it, as if it was as easy as learning to brush down an eopie, but there was a determination in her words too. "You may have been engineered to be what you are, Rex, but I'm sure there's something that can be done to stop your accelerated aging."

It wasn't something he gave much thought to. _Being_ there was enough. For now. Better to deal with the here and now and let the future take care of itself until she'd made her decisions. "Without the resources of the GAR to front the research," he told her with a shake of his head, "I doubt that will be possible."

"Pessimist."

Rex arched his eyebrows but didn't respond. He preferred to think of it as 'realism' but she'd see it as she chose to.

"Come on Rex," she reached out and playfully pushed against his shoulder, "no comeback?"

"Go back to sleep, Ahsoka."

"I'm wide awake now."

"You just don't want to chance another nightmare," despite being intimately familiar with the feeling, Rex also knew that it would be best if she slept. "I'll watch out for you."

"You need to sleep too."

"I'm engineered to last on a few hastily caught hours; you are not."

"Not everything's about your genetics, you know."

Rex chuckled at her sour expression. "In this conversation it seems to be."

"Are you sure?" Ahsoka looked uncertain. "I've kept you up enough these last two weeks. I can go sleep on the couch-"

"Enough." He cut her off with the slash of his free hand. "Suu and Cut will only worry if they find you on the couch and I'll get an earful," her chuckle at his dry tone was worth a few hours of lost sleep. "Sleep. I'll keep watch until morning."

"Until I'm out," her counter was stern. "You need to sleep too."

"I will." Even as he said it, he doubted he would. He was awake now. Alert. Another genetic boon. Short sleep needs coupled with a short waking cycle. He reached over and snapped the light off before she challenged him on it. He could hear her moving around, feel the bed shifting, as she tried to get comfortable, and stayed as he was.

"You'll need to lie down if you're going to sleep, Rexster."

"Once you're out."

The darkness was thick about them for several moments before she spoke again, but Rex could see that her eyes were closed this time. "You're not going to sleep."

It wasn't a question. She knew him well enough not to phrase it as one. "Don't worry about me."

She sighed and then, to his surprise, turned towards him. She rolled, grabbing his leg and pulling. In his surprise, he let her, only to find her head in his lap, her cheek cushioned on his thigh, at the end of it near his knee. He froze, her movements completely unexpected. "Ahsoka?"

"Yeah?" There was a contented note in her voice that hadn't been there before.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting comfortable."

How was _this_ comfortable? He shifted and she pinched his thigh. "Stop moving, Rex, I'm trying to sleep here."

"I'm not your pillow."

"You were at the lodging station," she countered, rolling and looking up at him, her eyes once again luminescing in the darkness. "I can't think of a time I slept better than that."

"I had to keep you awake," reminding her of the facts made him frown, "you were hardly sleeping."

"I felt rested. Isn't that what matters?"

"Ahsoka-"

"Just until I fall asleep."

"This isn't-"

"Please, Rex?" her eyes closed and she turned her head, shifting to get comfortable as her hand sneaked under her cheek and partly curled around his tense thigh. "I feel safe here."

She was going to kill him - and he was going to let her. "Only for tonight," he managed roughly, his words far gruffer than he intended.

"Thanks, Rex." He heard her yawn, felt her relax, and then her voice trail off as she slipped, far faster than he anticipated, back to sleep. "You're the best friend I could… ever…"

Friend.

Right.

He was her friend, her _pal_ , and this was no more than Ahsoka finding a little comfort where she could. Sternly ordering his body not to betray him, he tried to find a comfortable position without disturbing her. What he finally settled on was one hand on her back, between her shoulder blades, just under her _lek_ and the other limp on the bed beside him as he tilted his head to the wall after a quick glance at the chrono.

Shortly after oh-two-hundred hours; day break couldn't come soon enough.

* * *

 _Morning_

Rex stifled a yawn as he poured the water to make the caf, feeling a sluggishness to his movements that he'd felt so very rarely in the past. Ahsoka was in the shower, back from their ten mile run, and he was seriously contemplating going back to bed for another hour or two.

"Rough night?

He turned to find Cut looking at him with amusement and found he didn't have the reserves to banter with his brother. "Nightmares."

The amused expression dropped off Cuts face. "Yours or hers?"

"Both."

Cut examined him critically as Rex turned back to the caf, silently urging it to brew faster.

"Go back to bed, Rex."

He blinked, sure his ears were playing tricks on him as he turned a surprised look towards Cut.

"I'm taking Jek and Shaeeah with me this morning to check the fence lines. I won't need you until after noon and this isn't the army." Cut adjusted the caf maker and presently the smell of the life-giving brew permeated the air. "Take Ahsoka with you."

"Take me where?"

Cut and Rex looked towards where Ahsoka had just stepped into the room, pausing by the door.

A critical look showed Rex that she appeared rested and chipper, but there was the same kind of tiredness around her eyes that he could feel in his bones. He offered an explanation as she returned his look quizzically. "Back to bed."

Cut coughed on his caf as Ahsoka's eyes widened and Rex belatedly realized how his explanation had sounded. He could feel his ears burning as he backtracked, shooting a dark look at his amused host, Cut deliberately keeping his face buried in his caf. "Cut's taking the kids out on the line this morning and suggested I catch a few more hours of rack time."

"So… naturally you'd bring me with you?"

 _At least_ , Rex reflected, _she's amused and not offended_ .

"Rex said neither of you have been sleeping well," Cut came to his rescue unexpectedly. "I know how hard it can be to adjust to the peace found here, especially with where we came from. You've got time this morning, why not catch up on some shut eye?"

"Rex is more tired than I am." Her expression was wry. "I kick in my sleep."

"So does Suu," Cut took another sip of his caf, "but I'm not the one who looks like he's going to fall over this morning."

"You've also been married to her for quite some time, right?" Ahsoka cocked her head. "Wouldn't that mean you're used to sleeping with her or, at the very least, found a way to deal with it?"

Cut's chuckle had Rex closing his eyes and rubbing his temples as Ahsoka walked straight into the trap. He wasn't disappointed when Cut finally responded, but he was grateful his brother was only poking fun.

"One or two. If you ask Suu, she might be inclined to give you some pointers." Cut coughed. "Fair warning, _vod_ , most of them would involve _you_."

"Rex?" Ahsoka sounded intrigued. "Really?"

"Leave me out of this," Rex returned tiredly, dropping his hand as the exhaustion suddenly seemed unbearable. "I'm going to take you up on that offer, Cut. See you in a few hours."

Ahsoka didn't move as he neared the door and Rex was forced to stop, looking down into her eyes as he did. Concern shone from the azure orbs and he could feel her looking for something, hesitant. Inwardly he sighed, having no defenses against her. "Are you coming?"

Her lips curled into a soft smile as she received the invitation she'd been waiting for. "We'll see you after lunch, Cut."

"Don't rush on my account. For all your pitching in, it's the slow season and you are guests."

"We'll see you," Rex shot an exasperated look over his shoulder at his brother, "after noon."

Cut lifted his mug in acknowledgement and Ahsoka turned on the ball of her foot and headed back upstairs, Rex on her heels. Suu and the children weren't yet visible, but he could hear them stirring in their rooms.

Getting to their own bedroom, Rex closed the door behind him as Ahsoka stripped off her adornments, giving her his back as she changed back into her sleeping gear - a pair of his shorts and shirt - and shucked his own pants and shirt down to his skivvies. The room was still dimly lit, with the sun barely having crested the horizon, and the semi-darkness was comforting.

Ahsoka crawled in first, holding the blanket for him, and Rex slid in behind her. Shoulder to shoulder, they lay on their backs in the narrow bed, and Rex suddenly wasn't feeling quite so tired.

Turning on her side, Ahsoka rolled towards him, and the turned his head to watch as she tucked one arm under her head and the opposite hand under her cheek to cradle her face. Her eyes were wide as she looked at him. They stared at one another for a moment before her lips curved. "If you're going to sleep, Rex, you'll need to close your eyes."

"So will you."

"I'm just here to keep watch. I know you don't sleep well when at least one person's not keeping an eye out."

"I make a lousy solo operative."

With a chuckle, Ahsoka reached over to touch his cheek with her fingertips, hesitating for a fraction of a second before making contact. Sliding them upwards, she touched the skin below his eyes. As her fingers ghosted over the bruises there, her amusement melted away into a serious expression. "You really do look tired. I'm sorry I'm such a lousy bed partner. Maybe I should ask Suu-"

Rex coughed, turning his head and breaking the contact of her skin on his as he cut into her comment. "I don't think that's wise."

"Cut seemed to think it was." Her smile returned, this time with a teasing note. "Just _what_ do you think Suu's going to suggest as a way to stop me from kicking?"

He had a few ideas and none of them would help _him_ sleep. "Go to sleep, Ahsoka," he determinedly shut his eyes, starting a mental countdown from one hundred. "It's rare we get to sleep in. Take advantage of it."

"I slept pretty well," she admitted softly, "after I got back to sleep."

Rex refused to speculate on the why when she'd been draped across his lap all morning, and shifted, rolling to give her his back. "Good."

They lay in silence, Rex counting backwards in his head as he focused on his breathing and tried to ignore the heat of her behind him. Every day, every night, sleeping in the same bed as her seemed like an idea that just got worse. And yet, even as he thought it, Ahsoka slid against his back, wrapping an arm around his waist and drawing her flush against him. He jerked. The move shouldn't have surprised him, she did it almost every time, but it had.

"Sorry," she murmured and Rex could hear the exhaustion overtaking her in her words.

Covering the hand now splayed across his abdomen with his own, he squeezed her fingers, doing his best to keep his breathing even. "Go to sleep, Ahsoka."

"You too, Rexster." Her words were starting to slur and he could feel her breath across the bare skin of his back before her forehead touch between his shoulder blades. Her hand slid downwards as she shifted, across his stomach, and Rex halted it just above his navel.

Rex ignored the comment and instead refocused on his breathing and willing himself to sleep, much like he did nightly when this happened. Curled together, Rex didn't remember reaching fifty in his backward count before he dropped off to sleep, Ahsoka's hand sliding and slack, even as her fingers intertwined with his own.

* * *

 _Early afternoon_

Rex's internal clock failed him for the first time and instead of just sleeping for four hours like he planned, he found his eyes drifting open with a sense of disorientation unlike anything he'd ever before experienced.

IT was as if he was looking through water, his eyes glazed, his mind swimming through a mire that was so unfamiliar it was almost frightening. Giving his head a shake, he lifted his hand to try and rub his eyes... only to find it arm pinned. His head whipped to the side, his free hand groped groping for the blaster that was usually never far away. His hand came up empty and he rolled towards the obstacle even as his vision slowly cleared, lifting to push it away. The sleeping visage of one female Togruta he sometimes knew better than himself came into focus and he stilled, his hand a hair's breadth away. _Ahsoka_. Her eyes were closed, her lashes sensual half-moons against her cheeks; the only hair on the Togrutan body his mind absently supplied. Rex gave his head a shake, trying to rid himself of the foggy sensation and wondering why he was thinking about that of all things. Despite his move, he drank in the rest of her; the way her lekku lay against her cheek, one tail supple and firm against the underside of his arm where her head lay. The bow of her mouth, her lips slightly parted and curved into a peaceful half smile he didn't see enough of when they were both awake.

Her chest rose and fell evenly in her sleep, his movements not yet having woken her, and Rex carefully lowered his arm. Hesitating, he sought a place to put it before gently lowering it around her waist. As he did so, Ahsoka turned, murmuring something he couldn't catch, her body curling into his. Not just into, he realized, but against as her arm snaked around his waist and her head slid up his arm to tuck into the hollow at his shoulder. His mouth went dry as her lips touched his skin, her breath feathering across it like a soft breeze.

"Ahso-" his voice caught in his throat as he tried to make sense of the sudden situation he found himself in. The fog in his brain didn't want to lift and he couldn't comprehend for a moment just what exactly had happened. Ahsoka was in his arms - _where she belonged_ \- and sleeping as if she hadn't a care in the world. Something was wrong with this picture and he wasn't sure exactly what. Part of his mind was urging him to lie back down, wrap his arms around her, and go back to sleep. At least with her wrapped in his arms this way, she wouldn't kick in her sleep.

Giving himself a shake, Rex fought back the urge. He was awake for a reason - wasn't he? Battle rotation, sentry duty, or-?

A knock at the door drew his head around just as it opened, a familiar face appearing. One that cleared the cobwebs from his mind as his surroundings registered for the first time since waking and everything came back at once.

Cut seemed to take in the scene on the bed with one look and kept his voice down. "We're back from the fields, Rex. Take your time."

Rex gave his brother a nod and Cut glanced to Ahsoka and back to him before giving Rex a half smile and closing the door again. Rex didn't need to be a mind reader to know that look and suspected he was in for another talk with Cut when his brother got him alone. Ahsoka was curled against him trustingly - and he was easily embracing her as if it was the most natural thing in the world. It _felt_ right... and that in of itself was wrong. Not just because Rex could no longer think of her as just his Commander, and hadn't for some time, but because the timing was wrong. Everything was wrong and he wasn't sure it would ever be right.

Ahsoka needed to stand on her own two feet, to choose her own path without him, before anything between them would ever be a remote possibility.

Firmly putting that in his mind, Rex removed his arm from around her and cleared his throat before calling her name. "Ahsoka."

She woke as slowly as he had, Rex having to call her name twice more before she stirred. Her eyes fluttered open, unguarded and sleep clouded, and the smile that curved her lips was totally unguarded and sincere; a smile that wrapped around his heart and _squeezed_.

"'Morning, Rexster."

"It's afternoon." he corrected, unable to keep himself from cracking a half smile at her. "We overslept."

"Not possible." Her eyes drifted half-closed, her thoughts obviously not all there yet, as she seemed to want to go back to sleep. "You never oversleep."

Rex chuckled. "There's a first time for everything, I guess. Come on, Ahsoka," he nudged her shoulder with his free hand, noticing for the first time since waking that the arm she lay on was tingling with semi-numbness. "Cut and the kids are back."

"Cut...?"

Her eyes opened again, confusion in their depths and Rex suddenly knew what was coming next. She'd come back to reality with a jarring _thump_ and remember everything that had transpired the last month. He regretted it, but it was better she face it quickly each day, acknowledge it and try to move beyond it, than ignore it. "We're on Saleucami."

That was all it took for the sleep in her eyes to disappear and Rex saw a flash of pain so raw and deep, he wanted to look away. He didn't; instead he held her gaze, offering what comfort he could with his own, letting her know without a word that he wouldn't flinch from the reality before them. Slowly, the pain in her eyes dulled and she offered him a weak smile. "Thanks, Rexster. Should we go help Cut with the chores?"

He glanced down at her sleeping attire, not mentioning the fact she was still curled against him. "Dressing first might be the best course of action."

A flush touched her cheekbones, the stripes on her lekku darkening slightly as she pulled away, seeming to realize where she'd just been. She made no mention of it as she rolled out of bed and for that Rex was grateful. He wasn't sure what he could have said had she challenged him on it.

What he didn't realize as he swung his feet to the ground and turned his back to let her change, was that their waking position from their impromptu nap would deeply effect their relationship. What he missed, as Ahsoka was doing up the fasteners on her clothes, was the look she sent him, speculative and a touch shy, but filled with appreciation as her gaze traced him over from head to toe.

Suu was waiting for them in the kitchen, dishing up a couple of bowls of the hearty stew that had been the mid-day meal. She turned as they entered the room and gave them each a once over. A sharp nod of her head and she was placing the bowls on the table. "The both of you look better rested."

"I guess I must not have kicked in my sleep."

With a chuckle, Suu went back to the prep area and proceeded to efficiently separate the leftovers for storage, leaving enough for them both to have seconds if they so wished. As Ashoka settled into the seat at the table, she was famished and grateful for the gesture. "Thanks."

"You kick in your sleep, do you?"

Ahsoka glanced at Rex, who had settled into the seat beside her and was studiously looking at his food, his spoon moving methodically from bowl to mouth as he dug into his lunch. He seemed disinclined to answer so she chose to, curious how Suu would respond. "Rex says I do; I've even kicked him out of bed a time or two."

With a cock of her head, Suu turned from the counter, pausing in her task. "I have not heard you hit the floor, Rex. Do you fall more softly than Cut?"

Keeping one eye on Rex, Ahsoka began to eat and was amused to see a slight tint of red on the tips of his ears. Again, he seemed disinclined to answer so she helped him out as Suu turned back to the dishes. "Oh, it wasn't here. Rex and I have shared a bed before."

"Have you now?"

"Yup," Ahsoka did her best to keep the grin she was feeling from her face. "Though, now that I think about it, other than the inn before we came here, it was more of a blanket than a bed."

"On your missions?"

"Yeah." Unable to resist, Ahsoka's tone turned cheeky, "Clones are great bed warmers."

A coughing sound from Rex's direction and she bit her lip, struggling not to laugh as he exhaled and reached for his glass of water. Served him right for not answering Suu's questions himself.

"Have you shared a blanket with more than one clone?"

Blinking at the sudden, logical question, Ahsoka's mirth fled as she was faced with the reality of considering it and was slow to respond. "I... guess I haven't, actually."

Suu finished what she was doing and turned, a knowing look on her face. "Than is it safe to say that _Rex_ makes a good bed warmer for you, not Clones in general?"

Rex coughed, his gaze still firmly planted on his food as he took another drink of his water, and Ahsoka found she was as fascinated by her own meal, suddenly, as he was. The chevrons on her montrals and _lekku_ began to darken with embarrassment. "Not in the way you mean."

Suu was quiet for several long moments but Ahsoka couldn't chance a look her way as she lifted her first bite to her mouth. Blowing on it, she tasted the first bite and then began to eat. Her mouth was full when Suu finally responded, giving her no chance to promptly respond.

"I only asked the question, Ahsoka. It is _you_ who placed meaning to it."

Suu was gone by the time Ahsoka finished choking on her food and managed to swallow it, Rex handing her a glass of water without comment. An uncomfortable silence stretched between them and Ahsoka found she wanted to look at Rex but couldn't seem to. _Added meaning to the words; what did Suu mean?_ Even as she thought it, Ahsoka found she wasn't sure she wanted the answers. Her mind had conjured an image of herself and Rex, curled up in bed, much like they had been that afternoon only with remarkably less clothing - if that was possible - and in the inn where they'd been before Saleucami, when they'd been registered as husband and wife.

It was a shift in her thinking that took her not completely by surprise, it had to have grown from somewhere after all, but the timing was all wrong. If she'd still been a part of the GAR and the Jedi Order, she'd have known what to do with the thoughts. Rules and Regulations had kept them firmly in their roles, bound by friendship that always seemed to hover as more but never crossed the line. Now, thought... now she'd lost everything _except_ Rex and Ahsoka wasn't as sure of what they were, if they were anything more, beyond friends.

"Ignore her, Ahsoka. She doesn't know what she's talking about."

Lifting her head, she found Rex watching her, his gaze slightly guarded. "She married a Clone, Rex," she countered softly, looking away to the viewport as she struggled to collect her thoughts. "She's the one person I think who is _qualified_ to make that assessment."

"Suu and Cut might be married," his hand fell on hers, drawing her gaze back to his, "but that doesn't make them an expert. What works for one, doesn't work for all."

"Is sleeping with me so bad?"

He cracked a half smile with a breath of a laugh. "No."

"You're probably sleep better if I stayed on the couch from now on."

"I'm not rehashing this with you, Ahsoka. I'd rather you slept with me."

"So you know I won't leave you."

Rex paused, dead serious. "Will you?"

"Never." It was an answer she didn't have to think about. "I tried to once and nearly died in the process."

"I always said you were a quick learner." They shared a smile and Ahsoka could feel the knot that had formed in her chest easing. "Eat. Cut's expecting our help with the chores."

While it didn't resolve anything regarding their relationship or what it was, Rex's easy turn of the topic put her at ease and Ahsoka did as he told her, finishing her food in silence, and grateful for the reprieve. There was just too much on her plate, figuratively speaking, that she had to deal with before she could even consider the true meaning behind her reaction to Suu's words.

For now she needed Rex to be her friend and, thankfully, he seemed to want nothing further from her. While that thought would continue to disturb her, she buried it within her subconscious and instead forced herself to focus on the other tasks before her - like deciding what had to come next in her life. If she was more hyper-aware of Rex's actions than before Suu had drawn her attention to it, Ahsoka was determined to ignore it for as long as she could.

What she wouldn't realize until much later was that a shift had already occurred, one that had already begun to subtly shift the fabric of her relationship with Rex.


	5. Part 4

**Part 4**

 ** _Saleucami – two weeks post arrival_**

"Is it wrong-"

Ahsoka's lips kicked into a faint smile as Rex's voice reached her, but she didn't turn to look at him as he continued, drawing closer, her eyes on the midnight sky.

"-to know I'd find you here?"

"You know me better than anyone, Rex," she returned softly as he appeared above her, blocking out the view of the sky. "If you couldn't find me when I wanted to disappear, no one would."

His silhouette disappeared as he settled next to her on the freshly tilled earth. "We're undoing all our hard work."

"It must be a theme I have going."

Rex fell silent and Ahsoka saw him lean back on his elbows, mimicking her posture. He said nothing, did nothing, simply waited as he normally did. As he did when he knew she needed to talk and not listen; as when he knew she needed a friend and not a mentor. It was his way of being there for her and one she wasn't sure she'd have done without since arriving here. Rex was ever her strength these days; a strength she wasn't sure she knew what she'd do without.

She sighed. "I'm sorry, Rex."

"What for?"

"All you've done since we got here was listen to me whine," she slanted him a look, his face cast in shadows and starlight even with her night vision. "That's gotta be old by now."

He reached over, plucking one of the native grasses that had been felled by the plows earlier and twisting the reed through his fingers. Rex continued to say nothing, but Ahsoka could see he was considering her words. He always did.

"Honestly, Ahsoka?"

She nodded. "I'm a big girl. I can take it."

He smiled faintly. Not a smirk or a half smile, but a genuine smile. "I enjoy these moments."

It wasn't the answer she'd been expecting. "You enjoy listening to me gripe."

"It's not all griping."

No, she admitted silently, it really wasn't. In between her gripes and complaints were bouts of nostalgic reminiscing, of speculation about those they'd left behind. There was a genuine warmth between them, like there had always been, but Ahsoka could feel there was… _more_ than what had been there before. Being with Rex like this was soothing. Calming. It was like they were the only two people in the galaxy and, for all their cares and worries and the emotional baggage they'd brought along with them, they were _free_.

If she didn't yet know what more to do with that freedom than impose on Cut and Suu and their family, she trusted that she wasn't yet ready to make that decision - Rex had shown her that.

The silence between them was easy and deep as they stared at the stars overhead, watching them move through the night sky for over an hour before Rex broke the status quo. He shifted, drawing closer to her and then rolled to his side, propping himself up on one arm. "Are you just going to lie there and freeze?"

Chagrined, she offered him a sheepish smile as another shiver wracked her. The temperatures had dropped steadily over the hour as the soil cooled and the warmth of the autumn day had drained away. "Maybe?"

"And you're going to insist on remaining to watch the stars."

It wasn't a question but she nodded anyway.

"Come here, Ahsoka." Rex slid one arm around her waist, drawing her into the sheltering heat of his form. She made no move to protest and even curled into him as she felt the heat radiating off his body. He tucked her against him, sliding his arm under her head and shoulders, and allowing her to use his shoulder as a pillow, practically taking her off the ground entirely. Settling against him, she turned had gaze back to the stars. They were silent for long minutes as Ahsoka soaked up his natural heat.

"Next time, bring a jacket."

"Sick of holding me, Rexster?" He didn't answer and Ahsoka got the sense of acute embarrassment from him, despite the fact he made no move to let her go. Their position brought Suu's comment regarding Rex being her bed warmer to mind but they hadn't discussed it and she wasn't about to bring it up now and make things _more_ awkward. So she changed the topic and continued. "I think Shaeeah would shoot me if she could see me right now."

"Shaeeah?"

"She's got something of a crush on you, Rex," Ahsoka kept her voice low but light. "I think that's why she doesn't like me."

"She's a kid."

"She's almost the same age you were when you met me." Tilting her head, Ahsoka glanced at his frowning face. "Didn't you tell me she's nine now?"

"I said she should be. I don't know her life day."

It wasn't something that surprised her. Rex only barely knew _hers_ , and they'd been a team for several years. "We should find out. I'd hate to have it happen and miss it."

"Even though you say she doesn't like you."

She laughed softly at his exasperated tone. "Even then. I can hardly fault her for not liking me when the object of her affections pays me more attention." He didn't rise to her tease and she paused for a moment before admitting softly. "Besides, even if she doesn't like me, _I_ like _her_." Rex was quiet, not interrupting, and she felt compelled to continue. "I like them all. They're very welcoming." Shifting, she rolled in his arms until she was on her back and could look up into his face over her shoulder, suddenly serious. "Thanks for bringing me here, Rex."

"The choice was yours."

"Then thanks for telling me the truth about Cut and Suu so I could make it," her hand lifted and then dropped back before she touched him. "I think being here is good for us."

"Us?"

"Yeah," she cracked a half smile. "Us. You and me. I feel like I can do anything I need to, anything I have to, anything I _want_ to with you beside me, Rex."

"The feeling's mutual."

Searching his gaze, she regretted the fact it had seemed more guarded of late than when they'd first arrived. It was hard to see in the shadows, but see it she could and this time she couldn't leave it be. "Is something bothering you?" Rex didn't answer right away and Ahsoka knew she was right. "What is it?"

"You're not going to like it."

"I can't possibly get any lower than I was when you found me at the mercy of the mob."

"It's about the General."

"Anakin?" she paused. "Or Obi-Wan?"

"Anakin."

"Let me guess," knowing her former Master as she did, Ahsoka had a pretty good idea of what was coming next. "He wants a report on how I'm doing, right?"

"Not at regular intervals," Rex affirmed. "His orders were to report when it was safe to do so."

"And a couple of weeks away is safe to do so?" She cocked her head at him. "Have you already sent your report?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I won't transmit near the farm."

Silently, Ahsoka agreed but it stung to know that Rex wasn't simply beside her because he _wanted_ to be. "Do you have to send a report?"

"I suspected you'd object. I told the General as much."

"You _can_ call him Anakin, Rex," amusement laced her words; trust Rex to be formal even after discharge. "You're not technically a part of the GAR anymore, you know."

"Old habits."

They shared a look and Ahsoka turned back around, so she was lying in his arms facing away from him again, her gaze on the heavens. There was silence between them as the night breeze blew across them, Rex's form shielding hers and lending her warmth. Without it, she'd have retired to the homestead. Grateful, she stared at the sky as the stars twinkled silently, the occasional shooting star racing across it. Rex's breath teased across her cheek from his nearness and, to distract herself, she engaged him again.

"What're you going to tell him?"

"I figured you'd record your own message when you're ready."

Again, it wasn't the answer she expected. Rex was surprising her more and more. "Me?"

"There's no time expectation. I thought, once you decided what you want to do, you could tell him yourself."

"And if I don't want to talk to him?"

"Send a thank you to Senator Amidala."

"You know as well as I do that he'll still see it."

"Anakin isn't exactly discreet in his affection for her."

She chuckled. "Understatement, Rexster. Sometimes I think they'd be better off together."

"I think they already are."

"You too, huh?" She sighed. "I hope she can help him understand that this isn't his fault."

"He'll still blame himself."

"He's the only Jedi who believed in me completely; it could never have been his fault."

"Have you told him that?"

Ahsoka nodded. "I don't think he believed me."

Silence fell between them once more and Rex's grip on her tightened. Ahsoka could tell by his grip he was thinking about those first hours in which she'd left the Jedi order, the GAR... and _him_. Wrapping her arms around his, she squeezed his arms. It was a silent reassurance that normally happened when they were curled up together in their room. Somehow, it had become the norm and if Ahsoka chose not to dwell on it, Rex didn't seem inclined to comment on it either. It was simply how it was.

They stayed that way for a long time before Ahsoka broke the silence again. "Can you... _not_ message Anakin just yet, Rex?" He nodded, she felt his chin brush against her montral, but didn't answer her question verbally. Considering where the request had come from - which was likely his intent with his silent agreement - she continued softly. "I think you're right. I should message him myself, but not until we decide what we're going to do with ourselves. I'd like him to know we're going to be okay away from the army."

"We?"

"You didn't think I'd leave you behind, did you?" She rolled onto her back, nearly ending up beneath him again. "We're a team. Where I go, you go, right?" His half smile and sharp nod served to split her lips in a smile. "Good."

They stared at one another for long moments and, as the coolness of the soil seeped into her back, Ahsoka was suddenly aware of Rex's larger and much warmer frame in a way she'd not been before. They position was intimate and, if they'd been reversed, she realized she might have been sorely tempted to try and ki-

"Ahsoka."

Her gaze shot back to his from where they'd dropped to his lips. "Yes?" Rex's gaze held a concern she couldn't feel in his embrace and banished her previous thoughts. "What is it, Rex? What's wrong?"

His uncharacteristic hesitancy drew her brow down just as he began to speak. "You...know-" he paused and his voice was quiet when he finally found it again. "I'm not just here because General Skywalker made it an order."

For all it was a statement, it was a question too and Ahsoka found herself nodding. "I know."

His gaze searched hers, his face coming close enough that she could feel his breath on her face. Logically, she knew he was simply drawing closer to get a better view of her eyes. Her heart started to hammer in her chest, though, as she fought the urge to tilt her face to his. Now wasn't the time for that! Rex remained where he was, barely a finger's breadth between their faces, as he watched her for long moments. Long enough she tensed within the bracket of his arms.

"Rex?"

"I needed the push to get me away from the GAR," he admitted softly, almost shamefully. "Without Anakin's order, I might not have come after you."

"You had your family to think about," she agreed softly, swallowing hard. "I didn't expect you to come after me, Rex. I knew your first obligation was to them."

"You're a part of that family, Ahsoka. You always have been."

Unexpectedly, tears burned her eyes. "Not anymore."

"Always," he countered fiercely. "Your resignation just means you're not a part of the command hierarchy. It doesn't change your personal relationships with the men."

"And with you?"

Their gazes locked as the words slipped unbidden from between her lips, asking the question they'd both been asking themselves the last few weeks. Rex lay practically atop her, their intimate position one that only heightened the seriousness of her question.

Rex exhaled, but didn't move. "I will ever be what you need me to be, Ahsoka."

"Anything?"

He nodded.

"Is that what you want, Rex?" Ahsoka's breath escaped on a shaky, uncertain whisper. "To always be what I need you to be?"

Carefully, Rex pushed himself away and Ahsoka shivered as the cool night air suddenly rushed in. With the loss of his warmth and his embrace, she wrapped her arms about herself as Rex sat back on his heels, watching her. He seemed to be choosing his words carefully. "It is what I want for now."

"I... don't understand."

"Whatever more we may or may not become, Ahsoka, now isn't the time for it."

Logically she knew he was right, but that didn't stop her was asking. "Why not?" and, once she asked, she just couldn't stop. "Wouldn't _now_ be the perfect time for it? We're free; no longer in the same chain of command and bound by the rules and regulations we've always been. Wouldn't that mean that _now_ would be our chance to be whatever more we want to? Wouldn't... do you not..."

Rex watched her silently as her words trailed away with sudden uncertainty. Unable to bear his gaze, a feeling she'd never enjoyed, Ahsoka pushed to a seating position and pulled her knees to her chest. It was a discussion they needed to have but it wasn't the way she'd been expecting to have it. Now that she'd asked the questions, she couldn't un-ask and waiting for his answer was distinctly uncomfortable.

Despite that unease, Rex surprised her again.

"I need you to answer a question of mine before I can answer yours."

Her gaze turned back to his and she nodded once, a silent agreement.

"Have you decided what you want to do; where you'll go from here?"

"You know I haven't."

"Have you thought about it at all?"

"Some." She sighed, tilting her head to put her cheek on her knees. "It hurts to think about it, Rex; it's like acknowledging that everything really is over."

"You'll need to accept it sometime."

"Like you have?"

He considered her for a moment and then sat back down, stretching one leg out and using the other to balance his forearm as he leaned towards her. "I haven't accepted it," he admitted. "A part of me wants to go back with you at my side and pretend like nothing has happened."

"And the other part?"

"Understands why you had to leave and why the General sent me after you. For all I want to be with my brothers and on the front lines, fighting for the cause I was bred for, my place is at your side. As it has always been since you first became Anakin's Padawan."

"I'm not a Padawan anymore, Rex," she couldn't keep the sadness out of her voice. "I'm not any kind of Jedi anymore. Wouldn't that mean your place is no longer beside me?"

"When you became a part of our family," he touched his neck, indicating the decoration at her throat that had been a gift to her from the men of Torrent Company, "your status as a Jedi ceased to matter."

"Not to everyone."

"To those of us who know you," he offered with a nod to acknowledge her statement, picking up from of the tilled earth and letting it sift through his hand onto the breeze.

"Then you stay with me out of obligation. Because I'm your family."

"Hardly."

"A little expansion on that would be appreciated Rex." Injecting a note of humor into her voice, she tried to make the truth seem less terrifying. "I'm feeling a little fragile after your rejection."

"I stay because you're my friend and I care about you," he offered quietly, his gaze serious. "No matter if I have a desire for something more from you, you need to heal before anything can happen between us."

"If. Before. Anything." she swallowed hard, repeating his words almost as softly as he had said them. She wanted to ask if that was his way of saying not never, just not now, but couldn't bring herself to voice the question. "What... if I don't want to wait?" His brows drew together, looking at her with a touch of concern and Ahsoka expanded on her question. "What if I need something different from you, Rex? What if our relationship as it is, is something that's holding me back?"

"Then I'll leave."

"No!" her head came up sharply, her eyes wide. "You... I need you with me, Rex. I can't do this alone."

Rex shifted and came towards her, taking her shoulder between his hands, their faces close once again as he drew near to see her eyes clearly. Almost nose to nose, they stayed that way for several moments before he spoke with enough intensity his voice shook. "You _can_. You're strong. Independent. Resourceful. You _don't_ need me, Ahsoka."

"I might have been once," she agreed, her words breaking, her innermost fears tumbling from her lips for the first time, "but I don't know what I'd do without you, Rex. I'm not the same person I was before the trial. Before... before Barriss... before I..."

Rex pulled her into a hug, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and squeezing her tight enough to hurt. Ahsoka didn't care as she wrapped her arms about his waist and buried her face in his chest. The tears were sudden and unexpected, sweeping through her as if a dam had broken.

There was no judgment as Rex held her. His hands didn't move to soothe her as his arms stayed firmly wrapped about her shoulders but it was such a _Rex_ gesture of comfort Ahsoka found more consolation within his arms than she felt she had the right to. That didn't stop her from pouring out her troubles and soaking his chest with her tears.

* * *

Rex held Ahsoka against him tightly, drawing her into the v of his legs as she collapsed against him. Practically wrapping himself about her as her tears soaked his shirt, it was alarming how fragile she felt to him. As if, if he didn't hold her together, she'd shatter into a million pieces. So he held her, as tightly as he could, certain he would leave bruises but uncaring. She _needed_ this. So he gave her what she needed, tucking his head down beside her head, his lips pressing against the montral by his face.

His inner clock unconsciously timed her breakdown and he knew they stayed that way for four minutes and fifty two seconds before the warmth of her tears ceased and began to cool. He didn't relinquish his grasp on her until she shifted in his embrace and even then he didn't let her go entirely. It took another minute for her to collect herself before her hands slipped from his waist and slid around to press against his chest. Only then did he relax his hold on her, looking down into her tear stained face, barely able to make out her features in the dim starlight.

He said nothing for a moment, sliding his hands up to cup her face without thinking and using his thumbs to wipe the tears from her cheeks. Her eyes widened and he froze. Where the urge to comfort her, to wipe away her tears, had come from, he didn't know. All he knew was that it felt like the right thing to do. Hesitantly, he finished the motion when she didn't pull back, and then dropped his hands to her shoulders, sliding them down the chilled skin of her arms.

"It's getting cold. " At least, he thought it was based on the fact her skin was chill to the touch. _He_ certainly wasn't feeling it. "We should go back."

Even in the starlight he could see the way she struggled with the suggestion. He gave her the time she needed to come to the same conclusion and when she slowly withdrew from his arms and made her feet, he knew she'd seen reason. Accepting the hand she extended to him silently, he allowed her to pull him to his feet. Ahsoka released him the moment he was steady, looking away with an embarrassment he'd not been able to read if he hadn't know her so well.

They headed for the homestead in silence, walking close but not touching, and Rex kept one eye on her. She seemed deep in thought as they walked, her gaze somewhere ahead of them and it wasn't until she nearly stepped on a tool they'd missed during their clean up that he realized she _wasn't_ thinking.

"Ahsoka."

She continued forward and he stretched his arm out, stopping her forward progress just as she was able to step on the hoe. With a blink, she refocused, looking at him in confusion and Rex pointedly looked down in front of her. Her gaze followed his and she sighed. "I think I'm a danger to myself right now."

He tried for levity. "No more than normal."

"That's sweet, Rexster, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't normally walk into a farming instrument." Her response was dry, but she seemed to know what he was going for as she flashed him a weary smile. "I think it's rack time."

Rex concurred, worried she was going to do something else. "Agreed."

They continued back to the farmhouse, Ahsoka staying a half step behind him and Rex didn't protest, recognizing that she was unsure if it would happen again and, if it did, she'd simply follow his steps.

Arriving at the house without further mishap, they found a single light on through the main viewport. Ahsoka bid him goodnight and headed upstairs while Rex stood at the base of them, watching with a furrowed brow. He wanted to follow her; everything in his makeup was urging him to follow - and he held himself back. Ahsoka needed a few minutes to orient herself.

"I know that look."

Rex turned his gaze to find Cut, whom he hadn't - to his chagrin - noticed sitting in the main room with a glass half filled with amber liquid. "Which look?"

Cut shook his head as he motioned to the chair across from him with his glass. "Rex."

There was never, Rex knew, any use in playing dumb with a brother and he didn't know why he'd tried. With a last glance at the stairs, he moved to slip into the chair across from Cut. Without asking, Cut poured him a glass of the same amber liquid from a dark, unmarked bottle, and passed it across. Accepting it with a nod, Rex took a sip, enjoying the way it burned on the way down, before tilting his head back and closing his eyes with a sigh. "She's fragile."

"And you're worried about her."

"Yes."

"It's perfectly normal to worry about family, Rex," Cut informed him without any hint of humor, his words quiet. "Especially when they're hurting."

He let that sink in for a moment before righting himself and taking another sip. "How'd you learn all this?"

"Suu and the kids." His smile was faint. "Trust me, it wasn't easy learning to acknowledge and recognize what I was feeling."

"Another disservice the long necks did us."

"They left us the ability _too_ feel, just didn't encourage it's development," Cut corrected with a shake of his head. "Most of our brothers will never need that development."

They shared a silent moment in recognition of _why_ , and lifted their glasses to the fallen in unison before taking a drink.

"You've the most experience here, Cut." Rex glanced back towards where Ahsoka had disappeared, at a loss for how to help her. "What do I do?"

"Not a lot more than you already are, _vod_. She's leaning on you and you're listening."

"That's normal," frustrated, Rex knocked back the last of the whiskey. "There has to be something more."

"Not in this case. If I'm reading her right, Ahsoka will tell you what she needs, and that's damn rare in a female of any species I'm told."

Rex stared at Cut as he chuckled, not getting the joke, but didn't interrupt.

"You're both mourning a loss. Suu tells me that shared grief is easier to bear and overcome."

"It's been two weeks!"

"And have you come to term with the knowledge that you will not be returning to the GAR, _vod_? Or are you so focused on _her_ problems that you're ignoring your own?"

Staring at his empty glass, Rex considered the question carefully before answering. Had he come to terms with it? Surprisingly, he found he had. He'd forced himself to accept it without really realizing it. He still desired to go back, to make things the way they'd once been, but he knew - logically - that wasn't possible so he'd not actively tried to make it happen. Subconsciously he might want it, but it wasn't what _she_ wanted. Did that mean her desires overrode his own? Rex focused on that and quickly came to the conclusion that wasn't the case. He'd made his choice in following the General's orders, understanding without really knowing, he wasn't likely to return to the fold of his men anytime soon. And, if he _did_ go back, he'd be a different man.

"No."

"No you haven't come to terms or no you're not so focused?"

"Both." Rex set his glass on the table. "A part of me will never accept not being where I was bred to be. I sh _ould_ be on the front line with my men, fighting the war as we were engineered to. "

"But?"

"Ahsoka led those men for so long, it feels _wrong_ to be there without her. My place for the last five years has been at her side and watching her back."

"That's damn near your whole service history, isn't it?"

Rex nodded his acknowledgement of that fact with a curt jerk of his chin, taking another sip of the whiskey Cut had provided. "Damn near."

Cut was surprisingly silent at his acknowledgement and Rex glanced at his brother just to be sure he was still awake only to find Cut watching him. Shrewdly. And suddenly he needed another shoulder to lean on; someone to discuss what he'd been talking with Asoka about. Someone who had been in his boots, figuratively speaking, and chosen the route of family. Not that he hadn't, it was just that his route seemed to muddled at the moment aside from following Ahsoka.

"Ahsoka thinks she has feelings beyond friendship for me."

Cut's eyebrows rose at his soft, abrupt reveal. "She told you."

It wasn't a question but Rex nodded anyway.

"And what'd you tell her?"

"That I couldn't be anything more but her friend until she figured things out."

"Ouch."

Rex blinked. "What?"

"I said ouch," Cut repeated obligingly. "She didn't take it well, I take it?"

"Not as well as I'd hoped."

"Can you blame her? It takes a lot of guts to take that step."

"She's not ready," Rex cradled the glass in both his hands, leaning his elbows on his knees and staring at the remained of the drink. He felt deflated in the aftermath of the conversation and knew some shut eye was what he needed. Lying down next to Ahsoka at that moment, however, felt more like torture than rest. "Until she decides what direction to take, I _can't_ -"

"I hate to break it to you, Rex," Cut told him, breaking into his thoughts and drawing his gaze again, "but it's not just about _you_ anymore. You have feelings for her. She has feelings for you. Maybe it's time you stopped fighting it and look for a future _together_ instead of one where you just follow her."

Staring at Cut, Rex found himself uncharacteristically speechless as his brother rose, downed the last of his whiskey and turned to the stairs. "Shut the lights off when you're done, would you?"

Staring after his brother for long moments, Rex counted off the seconds, which turned into minutes, and finally into an hour, as he considered Cut's words.

He felt something more for Ahsoka than friendship; Cut saw it and a part of him had always known she was more to him than just a sister or fellow soldier. The uncomfortable experience at the lodging station on Coruscant had revealed an overprotective side to him that had nothing to do with their standing as soldiers and everything to do with her personal value to him. He'd come close to losing her and he'd simply acted, the sense that she belonged _to_ him so strong as to be almost overwhelming.

Too strong.

What if this was wrong? What if their being together ended in disaster and cost him her friendship? It had always been his biggest fear; that he'd somehow expose his true feelings only to be rejected. Yet, isn't that what he'd just done to her in the field? She'd taken the chance he could never have taken and he'd shut her down.

Rubbing his fingers over his temples, Rex exhaled a soft expletive, wondering when things had gotten so _kriffing_ complicated. His orders had been simple; follow Ahsoka, monitor and give her whatever support she required and watch her back. No different than any other mission really; he'd been her backup for most of their careers that it had simply been another natural assignment.

Until the mob and now Saleucami. A place where he was faced with a version of what could be every day but not what currently was. And now, with Ahsoka's veiled confession, saying that she needed more from him than he was already giving her... it was like something out of his dreams. Had he done the right thing in turning her down?

Tossing back the last of his drink, he collected Cut's glass and the bottle and took them to the kitchenette. The glasses went into the sink and the bottle was stoppered and placed on a high shelf, out of reach of the two inquisitive children. With a heavy tread, he headed to the stairs and began slowly climbing them, considering what he was going to say to Ahsoka when he reached their room.

Mid-stair he stopped, that fact sinking in, and he shook his head, trying to dislodge the half-smile he was suddenly wearing. Their room. He liked the sound of it far, far too much. A part of him, a very large part, wished it were true in the sense that it implied.

Reaching the door he knocked softly. "Ahsoka?"

"You can come in, Rex."

Her voice came back so quickly, he was certain she hadn't yet been sleeping. Slowly opening the door, he found he curled on her side, with her back to him, the light softly burning to illuminate the room. It was a simple courtesy on her part, an acknowledgement of his inability to see in the dark yet, with the soft light coming in through the viewport, he suspected he'd have found his way easily enough.

Still, it was appreciated.

"Thank you."

There was silence for a moment before she semi-rolled his way, her expression neutral. "For what?" He waved to the light and she offered a weak smile before rolling back to her previous position, giving him her back again. "Sure. No problem."

Rex frowned, watching her, and without really realizing it, advanced to the side of the bed and settled himself on the edge. He was exhausted, but his discussion with Cut was still running through his head. Could his brother be right? "Ahsoka."

There was a pause where he didn't think she'd answer and then a very soft, "What?"

He exhaled softly before making his decision, reaching out to touch his finger tips to her covered shoulder. She tensed when he touched her, her breath audibly catching in her throat. "Look at me."

She shook her head.

Easing onto the bed a little further, not that there was far to go, Rex bent his head so that his words would carry across one of her montrals. "Please?"

He could hear her swallow, feel her start to tremble, and yet he somehow _knew_ it wasn't from fear. She resisted his touch and the choked note in her voice when she spoke gave him pause. "Why are you doing this?"

"I hurt you." He kept his voice low and even, not even trying to mask the note of regret in it. "I want to apologize."

"Like this? Real-?" she finally rolled and stopped, eyes wide, when she saw just how close he was. "Rex?"

His hand slid down, over her shoulder and down her arm until he was able to lie it flat near the indent to her waist. It was a position that felt uncomfortably unnatural for him; he'd never done this before. Their noses almost touching, he struggled to regulate the pounding of his heart in his ears and ignore the voice in his head that was screaming this was a bad idea. "You asked me for something tonight."

Her throat moved and she nodded once.

"And I turned you down."

"You did."

"I shouldn't have."

Ahsoka blinked, her long lashes feathering across his cheek bones, and Rex could tell he'd confused her. "You - what?"

They were both tired, exhausted beyond measure, but he knew he had to do this now, while Cut's advice was as strong as the whiskey in his veins."Emotions can't be ruled by logic. You're hurting. You told me that part of your healing was in seeking a different kind of relationship with me."

"So?" her breath caught and he could see a flicker of something in the depths of her eyes. "You made some pretty good arguments, Rex."

"So did you."

"I can't lose you," Ahsoka's counter was husky as she turned completely over, practically under him thanks to his position on the bunk. "If us being... _more_ is going to cost me you at the end of it all, I don't think I can do it, Rex. I need you in my life. One way or another."

"I swore I would _never_ act on what I feel for you beyond friendship, Ahsoka," the admission was harder than it should have been considering he'd been harboring it for years; speaking it aloud made it _real_ in a way it hadn't been before. Terrifying though it was, Cut's advice rang in his ears and Rex forged ahead. "I couldn't, _wouldn't_ pressure you."

"Then you...?"

The hope in her gaze made him smile, faintly, as he nodded, closing his eyes for a brief moment before opening them again to look deep into hers. "I do."

"Rex..." Ahsoka stared at him for a long moment before her arms wrapped around his neck and she hugged him tightly. "I can't lose you."

Her grip was a desperate as the tone in her voice as she repeated the fear and Rex enveloped her in his arms, drawing her - sheet and all - up and onto his lap. "You won't."

"You can't know that."

"I know you and I know me," he turned to press his cheek to the side of her head, his arms just as tightly about her as hers were about him, "and I know us. We'll make it work."

"How?"

"The same way we always do." He smiled faintly. "Together."

* * *

 ** _Saleucami – two weeks post arrival_** ** _\- Pre-dawn_**

Rex woke to a pounding head, numb legs, a weight on his lap and a breath feathering across his cheek that were unexpected. It took him a minute to get his bearings, something very unusual for the Clone, and - when he did - his first thought was one of incredulity.

 _What the_ kriff _was in that Whiskey?_

He'd only had one glass!

His next thought was centered in the trusting ball of cloth and burnt sienna skin on his lap - and the very urgent press of his bladder as he realized he needed to use the facilities. Carefully, but quickly, he lifted the still sleeping Togruta off his lap and set her on the bed. She settled without much fuss, curling into the warm spot he'd left on the pillow and blankets with a soft murmur.

Shaking his head, Rex escaped to the 'fresher, noting that dawn was just starting beyond the viewports, the alight haze of light heralding a new day.

His memory of the night before was foggy except for an immense feeling of relief - and nervousness. Trying to put the two together, he finished his task, retied his pants and washed his hands before heading back to bed.

Ahsoka was much as he'd left her, curled into the warm spot he'd left behind. The light in the room was still on, something that he'd completely missed upon leaving, so Rex took the opportunity to shut it off. Looking at the bed, he stood at the edge for a moment, wondering if he should rejoin her or simply stay up, when her hand slipped from under the covers, searchingly.

"Rex?"

Her murmur was husky, sleepy, and completely unguarded.

His decision made, he adjusted the covers and slipped in next to her. He'd barely gotten comfortable when she rolled, her head coming to rest in the crook of his shoulder, the smile on her lips that he could see from his position slightly above her one of satisfied contentment.

She whispered his name again, curling closer, and Rex was forced to adjust his own position or be smothered. Rolling, he ignored her sound of protest until he found a comfortable position on his side. Drawing her close of his own accord, he rolled her over and lined her back up with his front, his lips ending up on the supple curve between her montrals.

Ahsoka snuggled into him with a murmur of approval and he heard her breathing even out and deepened as she sank back into slumber.

With a soft chuckle, Rex allowed himself to enjoy the feel of her in his arms, curled so trustingly close. Once they woke again, he'd have to let her go. For now, she was where he wanted her to be and, if he was reading her body language right, where she wanted to be.

Closing his eyes, Rex inhaled her spicy, heady scent, the lingering Whiskey in his system giving him a courage he might not otherwise of had. His lips brushed her flesh, the hand around her waist slipping upwards to curled around her opposite shoulder. Ahsoka's hand slipped over his own, holding him, her fingers slipping between his in a loose hand hold.

Rex lay there, in the pre-dawn darkness, simply listening to her breathe and enjoying the feel of her in his arms.

When he didn't fall back asleep, instead he watched the light in the viewport slowly increase, reluctant to release her from the curve of his body. Yet, even as the light outside increased, the clarity began to return slowly to his thoughts as his metabolism burned off the last of the alcohol.

The memory of the night before was starkly clear. Their discussion in the field, his talk with Cut and his _vod's_ advice... and then his return to the room he shared with Ahsoka and his own actions. Suppressing a groan he wondered again just what had been in the Whiskey Cut had offered him, even as he thought it, he was already turning to the matter at hand; he knew he and Ahsoka had been in no shape the night before to make any kind of decisions or promises. She'd been emotionally drained and exhausted - he'd been unknowingly feeling the effects of the Whiskey.

His grip tightened fractionally on her, loathe to let her go as his disappointment in himself becam palpable.

He should have known better - trust a brother to have something on hand that _could_ get them drunk. Or at least impair his decision making skills and remove his inhibitions. That coupled with Cut's talk had been a potential recipe for disaster. Fortunately, they'd simply fallen asleep with her in his lap.

The regret with the thought caught him off guard. _Regret? What for?_

Examining the emotion closely was uncomfortable but Rex made himself do it. With Ahsoka sleeping, he didn't have to worry about her watching him and he needed to sort things out inside his own head and heart before she woke - if he could.

He was surprised to see the image of her stretched out beneath him as she turned to look up at him, seeking reassurance that he wouldn't leave her, and his own urge at the time, before her actions had caught him off guard, came back. He'd _almost_ leaned down to kiss her. If she hadn't thrown her arms around his neck, he _would_ have - and he regretted not doing so.

 _I'm in trouble_.

Closing his eyes, he struggled with the emotions he'd come to associate with her, ones that had been growing for such a long time they were completely intertwined within their friendship. Ahsoka had said she wanted more from him but she hadn't exactly specified how or what.

His thoughts traveled back to the early years of their relationship. To the discussions and late nights by caf; to the debates and arguments. They'd sparred and trained and bantered, sharing things between them that most Captains and Commanders hadn't. Not to _his_ knowledge anyway. He supposed if they'd formed a deeper relationship, it was possible other Clones and their commanding officers had too.

Still, she'd been his anchor for so long, both in big and small ways, he wasn't certain where else their relationship could go. Romantically had always been a pipe dream, even if it was one he could consider now... once she figured out what to do with her life.

Considering what she'd told him the night before, there was every possibility that dream could become a reality. If, he supposed, she still felt the same in daylight. Night, he'd learned, was a time of whispered secrets and truths once typically didn't want spoken aloud in the light of day. Ahsoka had come to him on more than one occasion, after lights out, to talk. Those midnight talks continued to be cherished memories and would be for the rest of his life. That she'd sought _him_ out and not her Master was just a measure of their friendship and one he'd always been careful not to overstep.

Then she'd left the order, without so much as a whisper to him that she was going.

Everything since Anakin had sent him after her had thrown his world out of wack. He was no longer a Captain - honorably discharged, perhaps, but his rank had been an integral part of who he'd been. It had been part of what had given him purpose, discipline; something to look forward to and something to believe in. He'd had his brothers to protect and his best friend at his side.

Was it possible Ahsoka wasn't the only one who needed to figure out what she would be doing with her freedom?

It surprised him that he hadn't really considered it before, not truly, but Cut was right. He was _free_ and Ahsoka wasn't the only one who needed to figure out what the future would bring. Yet, even as he considered it, he knew what his future would be.

She was right there, tucked into the curve of his body. Ahsoka'd said she needed him and, once she figured out in what way, Rex had every intention of being around to give it to her. If she needed his friendship, he'd gladly continue to give it in whatever way she requested. If she wanted his heart, he'd simply have to let her know she already held it. If she asked of him his life; it was already hers.

His early morning thoughts were sobering and Rex wondered when he'd become so enamored with her.

He was a fully self sufficient man who could exist without her and yet, because he didn't _have_ to, he found he didn't _want_ to. They'd be separated many times over the years, been separated because of circumstance and mission, and those separations had always only made their time together more precious. Both had grown, but what was more, their shared experiences had forced them to grow together. To rely on one another. To learn from each other and those around them.

Was it any wonder they found themselves in the predicament they were now?

"What are you thinking so hard about before daybreak, Rex?"

Ahsoka's soft words drew him from his thoughts. She still lay with her back to him, comfortable and relaxed within his embrace, so much so that he hadn't noticed the change in her awareness. "A lot." he offered, keeping his voice down. The feeling between them was intimate and almost... fragile and he didn't want to break it.

"About last night?"

Trust her to get to the very heart of it. It was better this way anyway, and would allow them to move beyond the mess it was becoming more quickly. He didn't even try and pretend he was thinking about anything else.

"Yes."

To his surprise, she didn't tense in his embrace but instead took a deep breath and remained relaxed, her hand squeezing his where it was still wrapped firmly around her shoulder, his forearm pinning her to him. "I thought I might have been dreaming."

"You were tired."

"Not tired enough to forget. I'm surprised you changed your mind."

"Cut and I had a talk," he sighed, adding reluctantly, "and a drink."

"Were you _drunk_ , Rexster?" Her teasing tone was accompanied by a soft chuckle. "You didn't look it."

"I didn't feel it either. I only had one."

"Trust a Clone to have Whiskey that can give _you_ a buzz."

Her statement mirrored his own thoughts and Rex chuckled.

"What?"

"We think alike."

Now it was her turn to be amused. "You can't be that surprised." Slowly, her grip on his hand eased and he felt something soft, supple and slightly moist press against his fingers. It took him another heartbeat to realize she was pressing a kiss to his fingers. "We've always made a good team because of it."

"And because of our differences."

"Those too." Ahsoka sighed softly. "Do you regret last night?"

"Nothing happened."

"No," she agreed, "but a lot was said."

"You were tired. I was... intoxicated."

"Not before we came back."

True. He mentally agreed with her and eased his grip when she seemed inclined to move away. When she didn't, and simply adjusted her position, still not looking at him, to stay cuddled against him, his heart lept in his chest. She wrapped both arms about his, holding his arm captive and she settled back against him, his loosely closed hand now resting almost dead center in her chest.

Rex swallowed hard and tried very hard _not_ to think about there his hand was and the fact she didn't seem inclined to let him move it when he tried. "Do _you_ regret last night, Ahsoka?"

"There's nothing to regret," she offered solemnly. "As you said."

Except now, with her affirmation of his feelings, things were feeling a touch awkward between them. Rex didn't like it. "Don't lie to me," he chided softly, twisting his hand and twining his fingers through hers as he caught one of them. "Talk to me."

For a few moments they simply lay still, Ahsoka's thumb stroking the backs of his fingers and then, she began to talk.

"I wish last night could have been real," she admitted. "That you really were willing to give us a chance. I understand why you don't want to, Rex - I really do - but... I feel stronger with you beside me."

He wanted to affirm that he'd never leave, but held his peace; she had more to say.

"You give me strength and I take such comfort in your presence. I had a crush on Lux once, but it really was just a crush. Compared to what you and I have, even as just friends... there's no comparison. I've lost everything; who I was, what I was. My home, my friends, my whole support system... except I haven't. You're here, with me, holding onto my hand as we forge ahead together. Lux couldn't do that; he'd probably try and smother me. To take over."

Rex chuckle softly at her wry assessment, but didn't disagree. What little he knew of the Senator first hand and what little she'd told him, gave him the same impression.

"You don't do that. You never have. I need to make my own mistakes and you let me make them. You support me when I do, catching me if I fall, or giving me the hand, the _strength_ to get back up if it's a fall I need to have. You keep me in check," her tone turned wry and she ducked her head back to their intertwined hands, pressing her lips against the back of his again, "when I get too big on myself and start to get cocky."

"Someone has to."

She laughed softly, lifting her head away from their joined fingers. "But you do it without being hurtful or mean, Rex. It would be so easy for you to just be curt with me, but you're not. Unless I've put myself in danger, anyway." They shared a soft laugh and Ahsoka continued. "You ground me with just the littlest of gestures or comments and you _always_ believe in me. Even when nobody else did, even when no one else _does_ , you _do._ You give me courage and strength; next to you, _with you_ , I feel like we can do anything even when the world is crumbling around us."

Turning in his embrace, Ahsoka finally looked at him with luminescent eyes, one hand still intertwined with his own, her other coming up to cup the side of his face. "You _know_ who I am, Rex; nobody knows me like you do. Nobody _can_ know me like you do. You've seen all of me - at my best and my worst, and you're _still here_. Beside me. With me. I don't want you beside me because I can't be strong without you; I want you here because I'm stronger _with_ you."

Whatever he'd been expecting when she'd begun talking, a full confession wasn't it and it left him utterly speechless. Not just for what she was saying, but for the similarity to his own feelings and the clarity, the _conviction_ of it in her eyes. Where last night she'd been tired and emotional, sleep had obviously given her a chance to subconsciously work through many things .

"Why would I want anything different than the fullness of the acceptance you've shown me - except more of it?"

They stared at one another for a long moment, and Rex realized she was waiting for his response. Humbled, all he could manage was a gruff. "That's a lot for a man to live up to."

"It's not when it's already everything you do. I don't know what lies ahead of me, of _us_ , Rex. I don't know who we'll become or where we'll be, but I do know I want you to stay beside me as we work it out together." Her smile was shy as she shook her head, her thumb sliding over his cheek and down, across the scar on his chin even as her gaze darted to his mouth and back. "But I want us to be open to the idea of becoming more than friends instead of fighting it. If it doesn't work, we can stay friends; if it does..."

"When did you get so wise?"

"I was almost a Jedi Knight, you know."

The sadness in her eyes was lessened, but still profound. "You must have learned a thing or two then," he tried for a light tease and felt his heart squeeze painfully when she smiled back at him.

"Being here, being with _you_ , feels like I'm home - like where I belong, Rex." She searched his gaze. "Do you think you could ever feel the same way about me?"

There were no excuses now and Rex knew if he laid his cards on the table there was no going back. Even as he thought it, he knew there had been no going back when he'd gone after her. There had been no going back for a long, long time. "I already do."

Her slowly blinked response was an incredulity he had no trouble recognizing and he felt compelled to full disclosure.

"I have for a long time, Ahsoka."

"You have?"

He nodded, hearing the echo of their conversation from a few hours ago in her words and smiled. A real smile, one he could _feel_ reach his eyes."I have."

"For how long?"

"Far longer," he told her softy, bending his neck and closing the inches between them, "than you'll ever know."

Her sigh was as soft as his words as she lifted her lips to his.


	6. Part 5

**Part 5**

 ** _Saleucami – Sixteen Days post arrival; Afternoon_**

"You took my advice."

Rex didn't so much as glance up from where he was cleaning out the stall in the barn, the easy smile he'd been wearing since his and Ahsoka's first - and so far only - kiss two days ago not having yet disappeared. He wasn't sure he'd ever be able to wipe it away. "Or something like it," he agreed with his brother, tossing another shovel of _osik_ to the side.

"Looks good on your two," Cut leaned his elbows on the stall wall. "What made you go for it?"

Wiping one forearm across his brow, Rex shot Cut a glance before resuming his task. "Your little midnight talk. And a talk of our own that morning."

"Feel better?"

"Terrified." The admission to Cut was easy and did nothing to diminish his smile. "Not quite sure of what."

Cut shared his laugh. "Suu tells me that's pretty normal when you step into the unknown, especially with someone else. She did make a point of reminding every step of the way that I wasn't the only one feeling that way."

"Jedi don't get terrified."

"Jedi aren't supposed to form attachments either," Cut's tone was teasing. "Good thing she's not a Jedi anymore, isn't it?"

"You obviously never met my Master, Cut," Ahsoka's voice drew both of their heads around and Rex's look was appreciative as she stepped into the darker space, her gaze seeking his out immediately. "If you'd ever asked _him_ , he'd tell you no attachments - and then he'd turn around and go visit his _close_ and _personal_ friend, Padmé Amidala."

"The Nabooian Senator?" Cut's eyebrows his his hairline and he let out a whistle, drawing both of their gazes when he had no trouble identifying Padmé just by her name. Seeing it, he explained. "She shows up on the holonet every now and again. I didn't realize you knew anyone that influential."

"Aside from the Jedi?" Now Ahsoka's tone was teasing and Rex was gratified to see that she seemed more herself than since she'd left the order. Their midnight talk seemed to have relieved one of her concerns and allowed her to focus on other things. If nothing else, while they explored what was between them, it gave her leave to concentrate her focus on the things Rex felt needed her more immediate attention. That he got pleasure out of seeing her more relaxed was simply a delightful consequence. "As protectors of the Galactic Republic, we spent a lot of time at the Senate. Rex didn't always come with us; he wasn't allowed on Jedi Business."

"Somehow, I can't see that stopping him."

It was Rex's turn to laugh this time at Cut's cheeky statement. "Only when either her or her Master were doing something even I considered foolish."

"Even you?" Cut echoed the oddest part of Rex's statement with a shake of his head as Ahsoka collected one of the shovels and came to join Rex inside the stall. "There's a story there."

"Or three or ten," Ahsoka agreed, stepping ahead of Rex. Rex watched as she began digging into the corners for what he'd missed and, as one, they began working the stall. Ahsoka at its head, dragging the bedding and droppings from the corners and sliding them back to him to dispose of them to the side. "They're not exactly stories for children, though."

A giggle somewhere beyond the walls of the barn gave Jek accompanied by a loud and very obvious shusshing noise from his sister.

 _"Shhh! They'll hear you."_

Amused, Rex looked at Ahsoka and their eyes met and he lifted one eyebrow in silent challenge. They knew the kids were there, he wanted to say, what would it hurt to have a little fun with them?

Her answering smirk and dancing eyes told him that she got his message and Cut seemed to catch on, raising his voice. "Then it's a good thing there are no children around, isn't it?"

The giggle beyond the barn walls was audible, but Ahsoka turned back to her task and resumed passing Rex the refuse on the stall floor. Dropping her voice pitch, Rex could tell she was deliberately trying to draw the kids into the area where they would be busted by the adults.

"Well, see, there was this one time that I went on a mission behind enemy lines with Senator Amidala."

"You're really going to start there?"

Ahsoka shot him a grin. "Is there a problem with it?"

"I was thinking," Rex countered slyly, "you might want to start with the mission to save the droid."

"Which one?" Her grin was almost evil. "The one where you nearly got killed by Grievous?"

"I'm not the one who engaged him in single lightsaber combat." He could joke about it now, but at the time he'd been afraid for her. Just thinking about all he would have missed if she'd been killed so early on in their friendship gave him pause.

"You'd look pretty wicked with a lightsaber in hand, Rex."

"I'm no Jedi," he tossed back the words solemnly, the echo of the last time he'd said them and the mission they'd been on coming to his thoughts. "And I've always been better with blasters."

"But even you couldn't train Jar Jar."

They shared a look and Ahsoka burst out laughing as Rex chuckled. "No one could train Representative Binks - that was not my fault."

"Representative Binks?"

Cut's question made Rex start and he realized he'd completely forgotten about his brother's presence as he and Ahsoka had begun bantering. "Senator Amidala's second," he told his brother. "He's the luckiest, clumsiest life form I have ever met."

"He's not so bad." Ahsoka interjected. "He's just misunderstood."

"No one is as clueless as he claims to be, Ahsoka." With a shake of his head, Rex threw out the next pile of refuse. "Trust me. He knows what he's doing and some day it'll doom us all."

"Then it's a good thing he's only a representative and not a full Senator; he'll never have the kind of influence Senator Amidala does."

"Give him time."

"Sounds like the senate's as much of a battle field as the front lines."

"Err..." Ahsoka loked slightly sheepish. "If we gave that idea Cut, it's misleading. Jar Jar served with one or both of us - and some without either of us - on a number of missions as a Senate liaison."

"They trust someone Rex couldn't teach to wield a blaster?" Cut chuckled. "Just makes me all the more glad I'm here."

"Senators aren't typically warriors." Rex wasn't sure why he felt compelled to add that. "Senator Amidala seems to be a bit of an exception."

"Must be Anakin's influence."

Rex was proud of the way Ahsoka breezed through the blase comment. "Must be."

"Anakin?"

"General Skywalker," Rex clarified, "our General and her-"

"Former master." Cut answered, cutting in before Ahsoka could. "Still, few Jedi I've heard about seem to be attached to anyone, even their apprentices."

"General Skywalker is..."

"Unconventional." Ahsoka finished quietly. "If I had accepted my knighthood, he'd have been the youngest successful Master in the Order's history - to go along with his title as youngest ever Knighted."

"A young Jedi Knight?"

"It's not as crazy as it sounds," Ahsoka turned, almost completed her task and passed more of the stall's waste to Rex, "We all have to be young sometime."

"You're still young."

"And here I thought I wouldn't have to teach a _clone_ about appearances and age," Ahsoka smiled. "Rex will tell you that experience out weighs everything."

"He may have said that a time or two."

"I'm right about that." Rex cut in as he tossed the last of the refuse from the stall. "We're proof of it. Ahsoka's proof of it. Anakin's even proof of it."

"Clone's aren't exactly proof of that statement, Rex," Cut disagreed, pushing off the stall and bringing over a pile of new bedding. "I don't think it counts if you're bred for a task and excel at it."

"That's beside the point," Ahsoka put aside her tool as Cut came back with his arms full, Rex putting his own away as he came to stand beside her, wondering again how he'd ever managed to land himself next to her - and how they always seemed to be in sync. "Not all Clones amount to their full potential and some, you of note Cut, rise above it in other ways. Just because your bred for a task or trained for one doesn't mean you _will_ excel at it, it just means you have the potential to do so."

"And Jedi do the same for their trainees, don't they?"

Rex accepted the bedding from Cut and passed half to Ahsoka, showing her how to spread it out with a few quick hand movements. He watched as she copied him and listened as she began doing so beside him even as she took up their thread of conversation again.

"Most Jedi younglings are taken from their families and brought to the temple, in some rare exceptions, they are raised at the temple in one rare exception, a nine year old was allowed to be trained - that was my Master."

Cut whistled and Rex even paused. He'd known a lot about Anakin, but that one was new. "Nine?"

Ahsoka nodded, casting him a faint, mischievous smile and Rex got the impression she was enjoying his surprise. "Nine. I was brought in at a very young age, three I believe, whereas Anakin didn't start his training until very late. His experiences, though, taught him things that most Jedi don't really understand for all we talk about them."

"For Example?" Rex let the last of the bedding go and dusted off his hands as he cocked his head at her, curious.

"The values of Family, true friendship and love." Ahsoka finished what she was doing and turned to face him. "Most Jedi preach the value of love and understanding but how do you understand something when you're not permitted to feel it?"

"And your Master Skywalker was?"

Turning together, they faced Cut and Rex stepped to her side; it was where he belonged and he was pleasantly surprised when Ahsoka reached out to place her hand on his arm. Not holding his hand, but the contact was enough; enough to know she needed it in that moment as much as he did.

"Because Anakin wasn't brought to the temple until he was nine, he knew his mother. Remembered her. That bond is one that Youngling children break very quickly as they're immersed in training. Anakin never had that. He loved his mother and it was something he told me that the council wanted him to forget."

There was silence in the barn for a moment that was broken by a squeak.

Three adult heads turned as Jek came stumbling into the doorway, going down on his knees. "They made you forget your mom?" He had tears in his eyes as he looked up, staring right at Ahsoka, his face twisted with grief - for _her_. "Jedi are mean!"

"Er..."

Ahsoka slanted a glance his way and Rex shrugged, at a loss for how to handle the kid. Especially regarding Jedi matters. The sum of his knowledge came from Anakin and Ahsoka and their very few collaborations with other Jedi, notably Obi-Wan Kenobi - and Kenobi was a completely different breed of Jedi than either of the two he was the most familiar with.

Moving away, Ahsoka went to kneel at Jek's side. "Being chosen to become a Jedi was a great honor, Jek. It was an honor to my clan, to my family and even to my mother. She knew she wouldn't see me again but she believed I would be able to do good works as a Jedi and bring hope to people."

"But... she's your mom!"

"Yes, she was. And she made a choice."

" _My_ mom would never make that choice," Shaeeah glanced at her father as she came slowly into the barn, looking a little sheepish as she dug the toe of one show into the ground. "I'm sorry we were listening."

"No you're not," Cut offered his daughter a half smile Rex well recognized. "And your mother was never given the choice of having one of you trained as a Jedi. It's a great honor, as Ahsoka says; I can't imagine it was an easy decision to make."

"I can't imagine it was either," Ahsoka agreed, smiling down at Jek. Rex's heart twisted in his chest at the hint of sadness in her visage as she offered her hand to the child. "Here; on your feet."

Jek let her pull him up and suddenly threw himself into the Togrutan's arms. He didn't say anything, but it was obvious he was at a loss _what_ to say. The moment passed and Jek pulled away with a shy smile. "If you want a mom, Shaeeah and I will share ours."

The chuckle escaped before Rex could stop it at Ahsoka's look of surprise and he immediately turned the laugh into a cough.

Shaeeah didn't look exactly thrilled at the offer from her brother, but Ahsoka's story seemed to have touched her. "We will," her reluctance was visible as she continued. "If mom will have you."

Ahsoka smiled at the kids. "I appreciate the offer, but somewhere out there is my own mother. I might have been taken by the temple, but that didn't mean she stopped existing. Who knows, I might have a brother or sister too."

"A brother like Uncle Rex?"

Rex arched his eyebrows, curious how she'd respond as Cut chuckled and quickly turned it into a cough. Ahsoka's gaze turned their way with an edge of annoyance ."Not exactly, Shaeeah... Rex is more like..."

"Your dad?"

"Anakin was more like her dad than I've ever been, kid," Rex took pity on Ahsoka and stepped in as Cut seemed to find the need to suddenly step out. Rex could hear him laughing and calling for his wife, leaving them alone with the children. "Ahsoka and I have always been friends."

" _Best_ friends," Ahsoka chimed in. "Rex has had my back since I was eleven."

"Were you really in the war like dad?" Jek's eyes were wide eyed as he stated at her.

"Your Uncle Rex and I fought side by side for a very long time."

"Almost five years."

"Wow!" the little Twi'lek looked awestruck, "and you really knew Senators?"

"We still do."

"Wow..."

"Were you really going to tell stories for dad?"

"Tell stories?" Rex played innocent. "Where did you hear that?"

Shaeeah had the sense to look embarrassed. "Jek and me were listening at the door. We just wanted to know what you were talking about."

"It's okay, Shaeeah," Ahsoka told her kindly. "We knew you were there."

"So... you _weren't_ going to tell stories?"

Both kids looked so disappointed, Rex decided that even though they'd been eavesdropping, their empathy for Ahsoka's lack of parents because the Jedi had made her give them up, deserved _something_. "A story, eh?" he waved them over to the piles of supplies in the corner, ignoring Ahsoka's amusement, and paced back and forth as the kids settled in eagerly. "Either of you know of a planet called Malestare?"

* * *

"I can't believe you told them about the Zillo beast and its escape on Coruscant." Cut's words were frustrated as the kids raced up and down the stairs in the house, long past their bed time, pretending to be the escaped Zillo beast and the Jedi trying to stop it.

Nothing Cut or Suu had said after the story was done had calmed either of them down at all.

"Yeah Rex," Ahsoka teased, "couldn't you have picked a more kid-friendly story?"

They four adults were seated on the deck in the cool evening air enjoying one anothers company and listening, through a partially open door, to the kids chase one another around.

"Not a lot of what we did on the front lines is exactly kid-friendly," he countered and Ahsoka chuckled, reaching over to place a hand on his arm. It was warm under her fingers as she curled them around his elbow. "I picked something that would have made the holo-news. Was there another story I should have told?"

"Not one with world destroying Monsters."

"Not one I was present for anyway."

Ahsoka laughed softly at Rex's jibe. "How about the mission to the Citadel?"

"Classified." Rex appeared to consider for a moment. "The liberation of Onderon?"

"You're going to bring that up _now?"_

"What's done is done," said the ever calm Suu, slight exasperation in her tone. "No matter what story you chose to tell them, they would have been excited. At least they will sleep well. Once they get to sleep."

"Speaking of sleep, neither of you seem to be getting very much lately."

Ahsoka felt the blood rush to her head as the darkening of her montrals gave away her blush - or would have if they'd been in a well lit area. Rex's skin flush was more visible and, as a consequence, more difficult to hide. Still, she tried. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Suu chuckled. "I have two small children, Ahsoka. I hear _everything_."

Ahsoka swallowed. "Everything?"

"Um hmm," there was no doubting Suu had lain the trap and Ahsoka had walked right into it."Every squeak of those stairs is like a blaster shot when you are a mother."

Was there anything she could say to that? Feeling like a youngling who'd been called before the council, Ahsoka shifted in her chair and looked away. "Oh."

Cut and Suu chuckled together. It wasn't until Ahsoka felt Suu's hand in hers that she turned her embarrassed gaze back to the Twi'lek - and found a smile of acceptance and good humor. "We will not judge. You both seem happier for the late nights spent outside."

"We're just talking."

"I have no doubt of it Rex," Suu responded, squeezing Ahsoka's hand before letting it go. "There is much you came here to discover. That you are using the time to discover the relationship between you two further as well is simply beautiful to watch."

"Beautiful?" Ahsoka cocked her head to the side.

"I have heard much of the Jedi. They freed my people on Ryloth at great cost to themselves and the Clones and for that I am grateful. To see one of them, even one who chose to walk away, reclaim her confidence and exploring love? These are things beyond price. Your time here has done both of you good, Ahsoka."

Glancing at Rex, she was certain the color in his face matched that in his ears, her own quite a bit darker than normal as she looked away just as quickly. _Exploring love?_ The words sounded right and yet years and years of training had told her it was wrong to love... even as the experience of watching Anaking and Senator Amidala together had told her it couldn't be. Was it a good thing that Suu and Cut could see it?

Looking down at where Suu was holding her hands, the show of support so _present_ in the moment, Ahsoka decided it was. Whatever she and Rex were exploring, and it _felt_ like love - if love was ultimately trusting the whole of yourself to someone else - having the chance to explore it in such a safe setting was something she'd never expected. Among the troopers in the GAR, they'd never have had the chance.

"Thanks, Suu."

Rex's heartfelt comment drew her head up and back to look at him. He was smiling despite the embarrassment she could feel coming off him. No; not embarrassment. Focusing on the waves of his emotions, her eyes widened as she realized what he was feeling. Rex, her stoic Captain and friend, was grateful for the support even as he was abashed at, she suspected, being called out on it.

"You're adorable."

Rex's gaze slammed into hers as the words slipped out unbidden and he proceeded to stare at her. Slowly, ever so slowly, his eyebrows lifted. "Care to say that again, Ahsoka?"

Not really, but what the hell; Cut and Suu looked like they were trying very hard to hold back their laughter and the thought had been honest. Straightening in her seat, Ahsoka met Rex's gaze head on and tilted her chin in challenge. "You're adorable, Rex."

"Adorable."

"Yes."

"Me."

"Yup."

"Do we need to get your eyes checked?"

Suu and Cut burst out laughing at the heavy, skeptic note in Rex's voice but Ahsoka kept her gaze on him and ignored their hosts. "My eyes are working just fine, thanks."

"A clone is many things, Ahsoka, but _adorable_ is never one of them."

For a moment it felt like they were back in the GAR and Rex had slipped into teaching mode, but Ahsoka wasn't about to let him get away with it. Standing, she slipped over to his seat and slid into his lap with a smile she was sure he'd call 'unfair' later. Deliberately, she slid her arms around his neck. "Clones are many things," she agreed. "But you are more than just a Clone, Rex. You're my friend, my family; you're everything I want to wake up to in the morning and the best part of my day. You're strong and courageous, yes, but you're also sensitive and kind. And right then, in that moment, you were _adorable_."

Rex's neck heated and Ahsoka could practically _see_ the way the heat crawled into his neck and up into his face and ears. She could certainly _feel_ it under her wrists where they were pressed against his skin.

"You..." His jaw worked and Ahsoka waited patiently. "That is _not_ playing fair."

"Women never do, Rex." Cut supplied happily as he pulled Suu to her feet. "We're going to see if we can get the kids to bed. Good night."

"Good night."

"Don't stay out too late," Suu added with a smile as Ahsoka returned their farewell, "and next time try to choose a story where they will not gleefully destroy the house, yes?"

Rex and Ahsoka watched them go before Ahsoka turned back to Rex; a Rex who still looked uncomfortable.

"Did you have to say all that in front of Suu and Cut?"

"Is there something wrong with the truth, Rex?"

He cleared his throat and his arms finally came to slide about her waist, drawing her closer and, consequently, more firmly onto his lap. "No. I always want you to be honest with me."

"Just not in front of Cut and Suu?" He seemed at a loss as she teased him gently. "Cut and Suu have been where we are Rex. If I'm going to make a mistake, I'd like to get their help to fix it."

"They might have the experience of what we're feeling, but that doesn't mean they've been where we are." Rex hugged her, his forehead touching hers as his hands splayed across her back. "They're not former military colleagues."

"No; she's just the woman who saved his life."

"And he hers," he added.

"Well, we have _that_ in common," her smile was joyful, if a touch melancholic. "I miss the guys, Rex."

"Me too."

"I mean, being here with you, like this... it's better than I ever thought it would be."

"I have leave to contact Coric." Rex's offer was surprising. "I'm sure they'd appreciate some kind of message from you... seeing as how you left so suddenly."

"And they had to walk you through what to do with a head injury? I'd like to thank Coric for that."

Rex leaned in an brushed his lips softly across her cheek, surprising her. " _I_ would like to thank Coric for that."

"Did I ever thank you for saving me from that mob and taking care of me, Rex?"

"A time or two."

"Well, I'd like to do it again." Taking his bold move as a sign, Ahsoka screwed up her courage and leaned in to press her lips softly to his. It wasn't a long kiss, but it lingered for a moment or two before she pulled back shyly. "That's how I wanted to thank you last time."

"Last time we were at the lodging station."

"I know." She brushed her fingers over his cheek, relishing the feel of his slightly bristly skin. "I didn't think you'd appreciate it."

"After being called Mister Tano?" He looked somewhat amused and didn't pull away. "There is a possibility you are correct."

"And a possibility I'm not?"

"According to Cut I should just stop arguing now as you'll always win."

Ahsoka burst out laughing, breaking the moment at his wry comment and sharing a grin with him. "I certainly hope not; that would make things boring."

"Agreed." Rex pushed to his feet and set her back on the balls of her own. "Have you given any thought to where we go from here?"

"Now that we kind of have us settled, I have," she felt guilty for it, knowing that deciding to pursue this relationship with Rex had given her some thoughts that hadn't been there before. "I think I needed to figure out how I felt and how secure I thought you and I would be as a team before I could."

"Are you saying I should have initiated that conversation sooner?"

"Maybe." Ahsoka tried to lighten the mood. "Or maybe I should have."

"What'd you decide?"

"I was thinking... how do you feel about trade?"

"Trade?" Rex considered it. "Not piracy."

"No, nothing like what Hondo and his thugs do. Honest trade; we could bring supplies in on relief conveys or something. Senator Amidala did give me enough to buy a ship."

"Trade..."

Ahsoka waited as Rex mulled over the thought, considering it. He would have more to say, she didn't doubt, but he surprised her by simply nodding. "I know it's not storming the front lines on Mandalore..."

Rex laughed, his chuckle short but amused. "Whatever we do, be it smugglers, honest traders or otherwise, we'll be good at it. Let's hit the rack; it's late. We can talk more about it after I've had a chance to think it over."

"Deal."

Accepting the hand he held out to her, Ahsoka let herself be led back into the house.

* * *

 ** _The following Morning - before Sunup_**

Ahsoka sat on the edge of the bed with a datapad in hand and softly cursed as she deleted the contents and began again. The warm hand on her back should have startled her, but with their feelings - or at least the _possibility of them_ \- acknowledged, Rex had become more physically affectionate. More hugs, touches, even just a casual brush of his fingers across her back; they were all signs he was testing what she would accept and Ahsoka made a soft sound of exasperation even as she leaned back into his touch.

"Problems?"

"I'm trying to write a message to Anakin," she didn't take her eyes off the pad as Rex rubbed his knuckles up and down her spine slowly. "It's not going well."

"If drafting it out isn't helping, we should call him direct."

"I don't know, Rex," she finally turned her head to look at him and her heart skipped a beat. He was shirtless - like every night - but this morning his hair was slightly tousled. His regulation cut was already growing out and she could see his darker roots showing through. "I mean, we haven't really _decided_ anything. Other than what to do about you and me - and I can't see Anakin being happy about it."

"You're no longer a Jedi."

"True," she placed the datapad aside and shifted, turning to sit so she could see him without craning her neck and took in the sight before her with a lingering glance. Rex, bare to the waist, with his head propped up on his hand and the light sheet across his lower body. "Somehow, I don't think it will matter. Skyguy was always so over protective when it came to Lux, I can't see him being accepting of me with anyone."

"Just mention Senator Amidala," Rex suggested with a mischievous half smile.

"Oh that's devious." She offered him a shy smile. "Good morning."

"'Morning."

Staring at him, Ahsoka finally looked away. "This is all so _weird_." Rex was silent and Ahsoka cast a glance at him with a sheepish smile. "I never expected to be here, like this, with you, Rex. That's all I meant."

"Is it a bad thing?"

"Never." Removing the datapad from the bed, Ahsoka turned and Rex, reading her intentions correctly, lifted the sheet and allowed her to slip back in next to him where she promptly curled up. "It's a good weird - if that makes sense."

"You'll have to explain that one."

Pausing, Ahsoka collected her thoughts. It took her a couple of minutes, but Rex didn't push; he rarely did. He let her think, let her figure things out, and he _knew_ she'd talk to him when she was ready. She did the same for him - except when he was being a particularly stubborn _di'kut._ "Being with you as we always are, it's easy to slip back into old patterns. But moments like this morning or last night... they're just so strange - but wonderful. Just..." she floundered for the right word.

"Surreal."

"Yeah." Tilting her head to look at him, she smiled faintly. "Surreal. I feel like this is a dream where I'm going to wake up to find us back at our old positions in the GAR."

"And mired in protocol and regulation."

"That too." With a squeeze, Ahsoka pressed her cheek to his chest and held him tight. "I don't want that."

"Me either."

It wasn't his words, but the steady, if slightly accelerated thumping of his heart beat under her ear that reassured her. Wrapped together, they lay together in silence for long minutes, soaking up one another's presence.

"I'm glad you're with me, Rex." His arms tightened about her at her soft words, "I'm glad you brought me here."

"You chose to come here, Ahsoka."

"Yeah... but you gave me the option." There was nothing he could say to that and Ahsoka smiled as she listened to his even breathing. "Rex?"

"Yes?"

"If I call Anakin, will you be there?"

"If you'll say something to the men when I call Coric with an update."

As if she'd say no to that! "Deal."

His chuckle rumbled through her head and she lifted her head to look at him. "What?"

"That was too easy."

"What do you mean?"

His tone was teasing. "I'm starting to think you _want_ to talk to the men."

"It's not that I didn't want to; it's that I really don't know what to say."

Rex's laughter stopped and he regarded her for a moment. "Because of how you left."

Ahsoka made a face. "Yeah. That's part of it. A big part. I can't exactly say I'm sorry, can I?"

"You could."

"But I'm not sorry," she sighed, lying her cheek back against his chest. "I _had_ to leave, Rex."

"Then don't apologize for leaving."

"But you just said-"

"Apologize for _how_ you left; without saying goodbye."

She was about to object when the context of his suggestion caught up with her and her slowly closed her mouth. He had a point. She might not regret leaving but she did regret, in hindsight, not having seen them before going. At the time, she wasn't sure what she could have said that would have satisfied his... or rather, her men. "Would it be enough?"

"If I had left without saying goodbye-"

"Which I could never see happening."

"True." His ready agreement stung as he continued, "but, if I _had_ , you would feel better hearing from me than not."

It was a no-brainer and Ahsoka sighed. "Sometimes, I really hate your logic, Rex."

"That' only because you know I'm right."

So it was. "Okay." She wasn't going to fight it and forged ahead. "So... what do you think I should say?"

"What do you want to say?"

"If I knew that, I wouldn't be asking, would I?"

"So don't over think it," Rex suggested with a quirk of a smile. "Take a page out of his book and just call. "

He made it sound so simple; ridiculously so. Which, Ahsoka supposed as she tilted her cheek into the curve of his muscular chest to better hear his heart beat, it really was in the end. Just call and chat; she'd figure out what to say as she went. Rex would be with her and, if she faltered, could step in if she needed it. "You feel up for taking a drive into town later?"

Rex gave her a nod, his lips curving ever so slightly into an approving smile. "Name the time."

"After the mid day meal."

"I'll ask Cut if he and Suu need anything from town."

"Good idea." She heartily approved of his multitasking. "Ready for our run?"

"I'll meet you downstairs." Rex slid his open hand to the small of her back and applied a slight pressure before getting to his feet, collecting his clothing for their run, and disappearing from the room.

A smile curved her lips as Ahsoka reached for her own morning PT gear.

* * *

Their morning run was uneventful and Cut and Suu provided them with a list of supplies, credits and instructions on where to go to collect them. Borrowing the family's speeder and hover trailer, they headed to the nearest settlement. It was a long ride, but Ahsoka didn't mind. They'd slipped a credit for driving privileges and Rex had won the toss which put him at the controls. Not that she minded; back in his civvies again, watching him was one of life's little pleasures.

Despite the distracting man at her side, she managed to pull her gaze away to keep an eye out around them. Even if they weren't a part of the GAR movements, Saleucami could still be attacked again. Fortunately, the drive passed relatively uneventfully and they pulled into the small station right on time. Rex wasted no time finding the traders that Cut had recommended, simply handing over the list after introducing himself as Cut's brother, and was assured the Trader would load up the hover trailer with the goods.

After a very brief amount of small talk, Rex inquired about a transmitting station with Holonet connections and they were given a location on the far end of the settlement. Leaving the speeder and hover trailer behind, they opted to walk the distance, Ahsoka's stride as purposeful as Rex's and with only a slight hesitation.

"Now that we're doing this, maybe I should script something."

Rex slanted her a hard look. "No. You shouldn't."

His decisive directive made her laugh and she couldn't resist teasing him. "Are you giving me an order, Rexster?"

"Just disagreeing with you."

Which, she reflected, he did so well. Rex wasn't one to spare her feelings if he thought she was being an idiot. "I suppose you're allowed, being a free man and all."

His soft chuckle delighted her. "Brat."

"You didn't honestly think just because I'm no longer with Anakin that I'd stop being one on occasion, did you?"

"You wouldn't be you if you did." Rex paused, checking the names of the establishments around them before striding directly towards a net cafe. As he did, his hand slipped into his pocket and he removed a small, flat disk she recognized as a military grade encryption scrambler.

"Was that a going away present from Padmé too?"

Rex's grin caught her off guard as he winked at her and disappeared inside. Blinking, the full force of that smile hitting her unexpectedly like a punch in the chest. Rex didn't smile like that often and she didn't really know what to make of it. He'd almost looked... playful. _Not fair, Rex,_ she complained silently to herself. Damn the man was handsome when he smiled with all of his face. Not that he wasn't handsome being the stoic companion but when he smiled like that... Ahsoka shook herself and belatedly followed him into the café.

Inside were several terminals, with a young woman behind a desk at the far side, her gaze on the only other occupant in the room; Rex - seated in a chair at one of the alcoves as he hooked up the encryption disk. Ahsoka didn't rate so much as a glance and, rolling her eyes, she walked over to Rex and placed one hand on his shoulder, casually leaning against it as she watched him work. Ahsoka heard, more than saw, the girl turn away.

Several moments passed and when Rex seemed to be struggling with the connection, Ahsoka squeezed his shoulder a little. Rex was good at a lot of things, but electronics, especially like these ones, were more her skill set than his. "Need a hand?"

Rex glanced up at her and then slid out of the chair, motioning to it with a wry look in his eyes. They shared an amused look as they traded places, Rex's hands now on her shoulders, his chest against her back. Ignoring his presence, she examined the disk and the connections and quickly unhooked everything before starting from scratch. She felt Rex watching her carefully and knew he was cataloging each of the connections for if he needed to do it when she wasn't with him.

"I thought you said you'd already sent a message before."

"It was with a temporary comlink; untraceable and encrypted."

"And we're not using that again because...?"

"It's gone."

"Ah." Ahsoka didn't look up from her task and, after double checking the connections, flicked on the terminal. It flickered to life and the privacy settings around the booth hummed to life, encasing her and Rex in a suddenly private and enclosed field where their transmission wouldn't be overheard or intercepted. Ahsoka twisted one of the connections and felt more than heard the frequency of the field around them change to a more secure setting. "We're green."

Rex reached over her shoulder and punched in the feed for the holo news, Ahsoka entering a search for Torrent Company and Anakin Skywalker. She chuckled, lifting her gaze to Rex's and her smile was teasing. "They just can't stay away from the front lines, can they?"

According to the reports, Anakin's forces had joined Obi-Wan's again and they were in transit back to the outer rim territories for special assignment. There was no mention of a new Commander and Ahsoka couldn't help but wondering if Anakin had been assigned a new Padawan. Her smile faded as she turned her gaze back to the holofeed. _So what if he had?_ the question crossed her mind and she sighed softly. It wasn't anything to do with her; even if she'd stayed, she'd have been promoted to Jedi Knight and no longer Anakin's Padawan anyway.

Rex squeezed her shoulder in silent support, as if realizing she needed the reminder that he was with her. She covered his hand with her own and cleared her throat of a sudden tightness. "Should we call Coric and the Company first?"

"Call the General," Rex suggested. "He'll be disappointed if you don't talk to him first."

Of course he would but Ahsoka still didn't know exactly what to tell him. "Are you sure we can't call the company first?"

"Ahsoka."

That was all it took and, with an audible sigh, she punched in the frequency for the _Resolute_.

There was a delay as the encryption swept through the transmission, reaching out through subspace to the war ship and its compliment of soldiers. Rex squeezed her shoulder once more and let his hand drop. He still stood behind her, within the view of the transmission eye, but the only sign of his presence was the heat at her back. While she appreciated his discretion, a part of her wanted his hand to stay; this wasn't going to be easy. Still, having him there gave her the kick she needed to make the call and, when it connected to the comm. officer, a clone she recognized, she forced a smile and jumped right in. "Ahsoka Tano with a message for General Skywalker, Trip."

 _"Commander!"_ Trip looked genuinely shocked and pleased to see her, his gaze darting up. _"And Captain Rex, sir!"_

"Trip."

If her smile hadn't been genuine before, it was now; Rex was never a man of many words with his brothers. "It's good to see you Trip. Is Anakin available?"

 _"If he's not sir, I'm sure he'll become available for you and the Captain."_

Her throat tightened; Trip's genuine pleasure in speaking with her was without censure or judgment. Enough that she didn't bother correcting him about Rex and her new status as civilians. "Thanks."

 _"One moment sir."_ There was a hold placed on the line and then Trip appeared again. _"Patching you through now, Commander."_

"Thanks."

The image went blurry and then, before she had a chance to take a deep breath, Anakin appeared. Not just Anakin, but Obi-Wan was with him. _"Snips!"_ his tone held a note if disapproval. _"Took you long enough to call."_

 _"Forgive him, Ahsoka. Anakin's been beside himself since he sent Rex after you and not received any follow up communication. Captain."_

"Generals." Trust Obi-Wan to acknowledge both of them. Anakin wasn't exactly rude as a general rule, but he did tend to get overly focused; both Ahsoka and Rex knew him well enough not to hold it against him. She struggled, unable to find the right words. Rex, before she could, continued. "We've relocated, sir."

 _"You're no longer on Coruscant?"_

Ahsoka jumped in before Rex continued. "No, we're not, Obi-Wan, and we're not going to tell you where this scrambled signal is coming from."

Both Jedi looked surprised for a moment before Obi-Wan burst out laughing. _"No doubt she learned that from you, Anakin."_

 _"It's nice to see not all of my lessons went to waste."_ Anakin agreed, crossing his arms over his chest - but he was smiling. _How're you doing, Snips? Hanging in there?"_

"Rex has been keeping me in line," she told him honestly. "Thanks for sending him after me."

 _"None the worse for wear after your encounter with the mob?"_

Ahsoka cast an alarmed look at Rex, but she shook his head fractionally; he hadn't told Anakin anything about it.

 _"Don't blame Rex. Coric let me know after Rex called him to get information on treating head injuries."_

Ahsoka grimaced. "Oh. Well. I'm doing okay. Rex pulled me _shebs_ out of the fire and watched my back until I could get back on my feet."

 _"And are you?"_

Ahsoka exhaled loudly. "No." she answered honestly, owing Anakin that much. She felt Rex place his knuckles against her spine, the caress out of view of the recorder feed. "But I'm starting to. Rex is helping me with that."

 _"You'd be welcome to return, Ahsoka. Both of you would."_

Even as Obi-Wan made the offer, she was shaking her head. "My place isn't with the Jedi, Master Kenobi," she informed him with a hint of regret in her voice. "I don't know where it is exactly anymore, but I trust in the Force. I..." she stopped and then smiled faintly. " _We_ are where we need to be."

There was silent from her former Masters and she was surprised to find grudging respect in their expressions.

 _"Whatever you do, Ahsoka, you will always have our friendship,"_ Obi-Wan inclined his body respectfully to her, _"May the Force be with you."_

"And you, Master Kenobi."

Anakin, however, wasn't done. _"Are you sure about this, Ahsoka? Really sure?"_

"As sure as I was about leaving the order, Anakin."

There was silence for a moment before his lips twisted in a rueful smile. _"There's nothing I can say that will change your mind, is there?"_

"Nope." A weight lifted off her chest with the admission. "Not a damn thing."

Anakin's chuckle made her smile. _"Alright, Snips; call if you need us. May the Force be with you."_

"And you, Anakin. Be safe."

 _"As safe as I ever am. Rex?"_

"Sir?"

 _"Good job. I'm glad you're watching her back."_

"It's a mutual watching, sir." Ahsoka heard his grin even if she couldn't see it. "She's stuck with me until she sends me away."

Both Jedi chuckled and Anakin shook his head. _"Whatever the reason, it lets me sleep easy to know you two are still a team. When she cuts you lose, you'll always have a place here."_

"Thank you, sir."

"Don't hold your breath," Ahsoka retorted, sticking her tongue out at Anakin.

 _"Don't be a stranger, Ahsoka."_ Anakin moved to disconnect the connection.

"Before you cut us off, can you patch me through to the Company billet, Anakin? I'd like to thank Coric."

He hesitated and then smiled faintly. _"Sure thing. Standby."_

Obi-Wan raised one hand in farewell as the image fragmented and blurred, turning into a series of wavy lines. Ahsoka exhaled a heavy breath as they waited for the billet's comm. to be answered. She felt lighter; the conversation had gone better than she'd hoped.

 _"Torrent Company Barracks."_

The wavy lines coalesced into a familiar face and her grin was heartfelt. "Kix!"

 _"Commander! Captain!"_ Kix looked like someone had just sucker punched him. _"Holy_ fek _it's good to see you both!"_

"And you."

"Report, Kix." The medic snapped to attention at the easy authority in Rex's tone. "How's Company morale?"

Ahsoka sucked in a sharp breath at Rex's unexpected question. Her trial hadn't likely been easy on their men, but then to lose both her _and_ Rex when she'd been acquitted would have been a near crushing blow. Why hadn't she thought about that before calling? Rex's hand slid over her shoulder and squeezed, staying there as Kix considered the question and then, to her surprise, shrugged.

 _"We're managing, sir. It was difficult to lose you both but General Skywalker gave the Company over to Sergeant Coric. It's familiar territory; we've all been here before."_ Kix hesitated and then continued, choosing his words carefully. _"Scuttlebutt says neither of you are coming back?"_

It was a question they had both been dreading, but even as he asked it, Ahsoka tilted her head up to a stubborn angle. "I can't come back, Kix. I'm no longer a Jedi."

The Medic swore. _"Genreal Skywalker said as much. We didn't want to believe him."_

"Believe it."

Other voices she recognized sounded on the edge of the conversation.

 _"Is that the Commander?"_

 _"Kix, you_ di'kut, _don't be selfish."_

Kix glanced over his shoulder and then grinned, leaning forward and the angle of the call suddenly changed to encompass several more Clones Ahoka and Rex both knew very well. Arrayed behind Kix were Coric - who hadn't yet spoken - Jesse and, much to her own surprise, Fives.

"Fives," Rex practically barked the ARC's name. "What trouble are you getting my Company into this time?"

The ARC grinned; he looked a little worse for wear around the eyes but his sense of humor was visibly intact. _"Your Company, Rex? The way General Skywalker explained it, you're a civilian now."_

Despite his teasing, Ahsoka could read the envy in Fives' expression. "He's my bodyguard."

" _You hardly need a bodyguard, Commander,"_ Coric replied gruffly. _"How's the head?"_

"Just about good as new. Thanks for helping Rex, Coric."

 _"You're family."_

Warmth burst through her chest. Present tense; not past. Rex's hand on her shoulder tightened again and the burn of tears caught her unexpectedly. She'd ne _eded_ to hear it and Coric had given it without hesitation, as if it was a given. Looking at him, she realized it _was_ a given. Despite her choice to walk away, her ties to these men couldn't be broken. Her throat tight, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to reply in kind when Rex took up the threat of conversation, giving her time to recover.

She paid little attention to what was discussed and slowly, more familiar faces came into view as each of the members of Torrent Company seemed to drift into and out of the frame for a few words with their former Captain. Several asked when they'd be returning and Rex had been his direct self even as he'd surprised her with a slight vagueness of his reply. _Not for the foreseeable future._ It implied they'd one day return, but Rex was quick to clarify that both of them were done in the GAR and if they did return it would be as civilians only.

They spent over an hour on the holo line, exchanging words and wishes with the men before Coric had the terminal to himself and ordered the room cleared. Fives stuck around - he outranked the Sergeant and was just that contrary - but Coric didn't appear to mind. _"It was good to hear from you, Capt - Rex. And you Comman... Ahsoka."_

Ahsoka wondered if the order to make him use their names would stick. She doubted it; Coric had known them as Captain and Commander for too long to change easily now. "You too Coric. I really do appreciate what you did for me on Coruscant."

 _"The Captain did all the hard works; I just walked him through it."_

"That doesn't change the fact I appreciate it," her grin was unrepentant. "Just say you're welcome, Coric."

 _"You're welcome,"_ he parroted obligingly. _"It's been said but I'll repeat it; we wish you'd reconsider."_

 _"I don't."_

Three pairs of eyes went to where Fives was standing behind Coric and the ARC shrugged. _"Considering the circumstance of your exit, Ahsoka, you're better off where you are with Rex watching your back."_

Ahsoka blinked. It was the closest she'd come to ever hearing a clone criticize the Jedi with blatant censure. Unfortunately, she shared much of Fives' thinly veiled opinion after the trial, or she never would have left. "I'd deny that," she offered by way of appreciation, her tone deliberately wry, "except you all know I'd be lying."

The three men chuckled, breaking the tension Fives' comment had generated. "And I, " Rex agreed, before turning their conversation back. "Whose on deck for Captain?"

Coric's expression closed and, as if sensing the shift, Fives began to chuckle.

"Fives?"

 _"He is."_

"Coric's what?" Ahsoka persisted.

 _"Coric's up for Captain; he's refused it because it'll mean duties that will take away from his duties as a Medic."_

 _"I don't want Captain."_

"Really?"

Rex began to chuckle, joining Fives' amusement. "He's never wanted Captain, Ahsoka. He likes being the go to, not having to choose one."

"But Coric... you'd be so good at it!"

 _"Just because I would be, doesn't mean I want to be."_

"Then don't." Now three sets of identical, but vastly different, eyes were turned her way and Ahsoka shrugged. "I couldn't accept being a Jedi Knight, I'm hardly the person to push for you to be a Captain if you don't want to be."

 _"Hardly the same circumstance, Commander,"_ Coric told her gruffly.

Surprisingly, she didn't feel like correcting him and didn't. The title, while it stung, felt _right_ coming from her men sometimes. This just happened to be one of them. "True." Rex squeezed her shoulder and she glanced at him before looking back to Coric and Fives. "Our time's up. Watch each other's backs... and Anakin's."

 _"Always."_

 _"Same to you,"_ Fives came back with a faint smile. _"May the Force be with you."_

The holofeed cut out, but not before Coric could be seen shooting Fives a dirty look. Ahsoka chuckled. "Only Fives, right?"

Rex joined her laughter and set about disconnecting the scrambler. "He never changes."

"Like you want him to."

The faint smile on Rex's lips said it all and Ahsoka change the subject. "Do you think Cut's order is ready to go yet?"

"If they're in any was efficient; yes."

Quickly packing up the unit, they collected the supplies and headed back to the farm. For the first time since arriving on Saleucami, Ahsoka didn't feel quite so bad about her choices; she had it straight from the adopted family she'd had to walk away from that they were holding no grudges and she'd been invited back to visit with Rex. Rex was at her side, their relationship evolving and no longer constrained by their stations. The future, while not settled or certain, finally felt like it could happen naturally.

And it was a future she was looking forward to.


	7. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

 ** _Saleucami - Planting Season; five months later_**

"Ease up!"

Rex released the team of eopie, giving them the signal to move as Ahsoka's order carried over the mid-morning, her own team easing forward almost in tandem across the field. Slowly, they plowed the field , using voice commands and looks to communicate.

Since speaking with Anakin, Obi-Wan and the men, Rex noticed a change in Ahsoka. Having their family validate and accept her choices was a turning point for her. Not that Ahsoka needed validation and Rex would have had stern words with anyone who said so. Whatever the cause, she seemed freer, more at peace with her decision and determined to forge ahead with whatever plans they intended to make.

Through the winter, they simply enjoyed one another's company, moving slowly from friends into something more, but not crossing the line into physical lovers. Instead they _learned_ about one another in a way neither had thought possible and deepened their relationship in a way neither had thought possible. They spent hours upon hours after their daily chores just walking and talking, sparring and just _being_ together as friends and slightly more. Just _knowing_ that they could explore whatever was between them didn't bring about instant change. Both were still hesitant to explore it too deeply before they found their path ahead. They spoke of the future, those left behind, and everything in-between. While they were no longer military, they also didn't forget the lessons they'd learned. No decision was made by one or the other without consideration of the other and the Captain and Commander who'd been such a good team blossomed into a far more efficient unit, building on that solid foundation to bring about something new.

Together, as ever, they forged it.

"End coming."

Ahsoka acknowledged his statement with a way of one hand, not looking his way as she shifted the team and drew them back towards the other side of the field. Back and forth under the Saleucami sun the teams went, with short commands echoing between the two drivers.

Between them, they managed to plow the two fields assigned to them before sundown; as the sun was dipping lower and heading for the horizon, Rex wiped his forearm across his forehead and called the team to a halt. Between the boredom and the time on their hands, he and Ahsoka had trained through the cold season to handle the animal teams and, while he'd been a quicker study, it had been a good way to distract themselves from what came next; after planting season.

They hadn't told Cut and Suu yet, but once the planting was done, they were going to have to. While they hadn't work out their welcome, and had in fact been offered a chance to stay, Rex knew Ahsoka would never be able to settle here for long. Sure, right now they were content, but he could feel the shift coming. He hadn't been with her for years not to recognize the restlessness in her now. She wanted to get back into the Galaxy; she wanted to be a _part_ of it again.

They brought their teams back to the farm without spoken communication, arriving back just as the horizon was turning from orange to red and the brilliant ball of fire in the sky starting to dip below it. Rex unhooked the eopie from his team and led them into the bard, Ahsoka at his side. With practiced movements, they began to brush down the animals, the chore taking almost no time as they split the duties, rotating from animal to animal and working around one another with ease in the comfortable silence.

Before long, the animals were back in their pens and Rex was turning to Ahsoka. One look at her and his lips twitched. "It's time."

Ahsoka's smile at his statement was arch but amused. "It is."

It wasn't necessary, but Rex asked the question anyway. "Do you have our first destination in mind?"

"I thought we'd handle telling Cut and Suu that we were leaving first."

"That wasn't the question."

"But that's the only answer you're getting," she grinned now, stepping under the arm he held out for her as they turned to the house in unspoken agreement. "First things first, we let our hosts know it's time. We already promised to help with the planting, so we'll stay until that's done." He nodded in agreement as she continued. "Then... then we can leave and collect our ship."

 _Our_ ship.

His arm tightened around her shoulders. He held no illusions that the coming months and years would be easy. They'd likely be harder than those in the GAR, though he couldn't yet fathom how. Rex wasn't exactly afraid of change - war was about change - but this kind of change was enough to terrify him and thrill him all at once. Still, no matter the path before them, they'd be together. As they had been since Ahsoka's apprenticeship to Anakin Skywalker, they would continue to learn off one another, taking and giving as equals in a vast galaxy.

Allowing their experiences to grow organically as they forged ahead by themselves on a freighter of their own; a place he and Ahsoka would call home as they entered into the legitimate shipping business. Though, is he knew his partner, they'd inevitably dip into illegitimate to help people in need eventually. Regardless of the huge hurdles and the unknowns ahead of them, Rex smiled as they neared the house.

 _Theirs._

He liked the sound of that.

 _Fin_


End file.
